Let me begin with a little story. You have more important things to do, to accomplish. I’m just another check, another student in college. “Ah, I wish you wouldn’t say that,” and that’s when it started. You said that nothing is more important and you said it whole-heartedly.
It's crazy how one person can change your life, and you don't get a say in whether they do or don't. You become vulnerable; there's no choice in that. I didn't want to live for myself anymore, didn't care about anything. I didn't even have the energy to get out of bed most days. I was pretty unsure of myself at that point. There's no denying that I wasn't. It's at that point, when I least expected it, someone came into my life. For once, I didn't have to give my drawn-out speech, because she saw right through it. Sure, we had met before, but only as passing strangers. The second time we met, it was different, for there was not a teacher there to teach.
You see, she'll never understand how her simple, encouraging phrases changed my thoughts for the upcoming days. It wasn't the first time, I guess, that this certain person made me outweigh: outweigh the possibilities, outweigh the choices that were stumbling around in my mind. But before her little comments, I thought to myself, not one of you would have cried if I happen to disappear. You know that feeling, the feeling of being so vulnerably small. Like you let someone attack you too harshly, but you're not a puppet. You are a porcelain doll. Take away the beauty and keep the fragile emptiness that's within. That's sort of what it was like. That's what is was like trying to live this life and trying to commit to it. That feeling of being so vulnerably small is what lead me to that dark corner of my mind.
But enough about me, let's get back to her story. The story that's actually important where it justifies her glory. You know those people who are proud of the things you accomplish, no matter how small? Well, she's one of them, and she's willing to say it out loud. "That was another of those I'm-so-proud-of-Josie moments," that's what you said. It was like you just knew that I had to hear those words right then and there. It's like you knew that if you didn't say it then, you wouldn't get another chance to tell me. But the greatest thing that you ever did say is when you tried to explain to me that I’m “never not important.”
I believe that we don't meet people by mistake. That there's always a reason for an introduction of one another. I don't know why the world wanted you to meet me, but if I hadn't have met you, none of this would be happening. The point that I'm trying to get across is that without you, there would be none of this. I wouldn't get to write about how you saved me, how I have no way of repaying you back, how there would be no me. You made this happen.
All I can do is say how grateful I am that we managed to cross paths and how you have been willing to stay. For some reason, you were honored to take me at my worst and beyond happy to see me at my best. I'm thankful that I got the privilege to meet someone like you, and perhaps I, too, will get the chance to do what you did for me.
