To Whom It May Concern,

You know who you are. I am writing to you to address an important topic. For years you have waltzed in and out of my life as if it were no big deal, unaware of the damages you were causing in the process. Or maybe you were aware--that's up for you to decide. The purpose of this letter is to explain to you why my walls are up this time. You need to know why I am not readily going to allow you back into my life again. You claim to not understand why there is such a distance between us, you say that you want a relationship with me. All of what you are saying is great, but you have to understand that this is not the first time I have heard you say this. Ironically, this will also not be the first time I have tried to explain this to you. For many years you have been absent with little to know contact. If I was lucky, I saw you twice a year at most. You missed proms. You missed recitals, even though I have danced my entire life.

To put it simply, you have not been there, and now you contact me acting like you care. Do you know how many times I have taken a chance and decided to let you back into my life? I've lost count. This time will be different. I have enough going on, I don't need you coming in and complicating everything again. This is my attempt to protect myself; I am not letting you back in. Not again.

I have boundaries set up to protect myself this time. It's time for someone to fight for the little girl that never had anyone to fight for or protect her. It's time for her to feel safe and secure.

It is time for me to fight for myself because I have learned over the years that no one else is going to. It is time for me to fight for what I deserve. This is me taking a stand and telling you that before I did not feel that I was worth fighting for. I did not see any worth in myself at all. Something has changed recently however and now I see, I am worth fighting for. I am worth protecting. I am worth making boundaries and choosing to keep toxic people out of my life. This is me taking steps to protect me more than it is about payback. This is really not about you at all, it's me.

I see a little more clearly now. I am worth something. I am worth fighting for.

Sincerely,

Fed Up