On June 12th, there were roughly 320 people at Pulse, a gay bar in Orlando. It was Latin Flavor Night, and the majority of the attendees were latinx, queer and ready to celebrate during Pride month. At 1:58 a.m., at the center of the dance floor, he hijacked an entire religion and our community’s safety.

The bloodshed of that night ended at 5:53 a.m. when it was reported that the shooter was dead. The horror of that night still lives in the heart of everyone, and in the head of every single LGBTQ+ individual. It is one thing to see a tragedy take place and another to know, without a doubt in your mind, that it could have been you in the middle of that dance floor. So many people have told myself and other LGBTQ+ individuals to “not take it personally,” but how do we stop? Those people were our siblings, our family. They were people just like us.

When I heard about the shooting, I remember crying and mourning the lives of the victims, but also seeing a slideshow of all of my loved ones' faces and knowing that it could have been them. It could have been me. This was not just a terror attack, it was a hate crime. There is no word for this kind of fear. There is no way to describe this form of empathy. It is not that we as LGTBQ+ understand this pain and fear. Simply put, we live in this pain and fear every single day of our lives.

I know our community is terrified. I know that it is so much easier to hide in closets and in the shadows of our former selves than it is to speak out about this. Which is why we have to talk. We can not allow fear, violence and hate to make us silent. To anyone in our community reading this, do not stop being yourself. Do not tuck little parts of yourself away because you are afraid of the world.

To those individuals who have still not come out, I want to say that we are sorry. We are so sorry that you are having to suffer this tragedy without the rest of us. We still love you and whenever you do come out, and please do not let this atrocity be the reason you choose not to do so, we are ready for you. Although the world is not always a loving and safe place, we promise that we will help to create a loving home for you in our community. There is a place for you in this world. There is a place for you here with us.

To you all, do not to let this tragedy mar you. Let it hurt you. Let it make you cry yourself to sleep tonight. Let it scare the hell out of you. You need to let yourself feel it before you can heal but please, don’t let it change you. After a tragedy like this we have to be open and loud. There is a reason we have gay pride and this is it. All of those who have walked before us have fought for this. From Stonewall to Pulse, people have lost their lives and died for this. We have been fighting for our right to exist since before you were born.

A spark of hatred is worthless if we refuse to let it catch fire. We owe it to each one of our brothers, sisters, siblings and community members that lost their lives to be as loud and proud as our bodies can muster. I know when we are alone, it is easy to feel isolated and afraid. When we stand together, we can accomplish so much. Our community can be so strong when we stand together and do not let fear burn us alive.

On June 12th, our community was attacked, and we lost 49 members of our family. I know it is easy to feel alone when these things happen. I know it seems like the world hates us. That is not true. You are not alone in the world. We are here and there are so many of us. That day, thousands of us around the world filled the streets to stand in solidarity. To say, “We are here, and we are not afraid.” We will not let hatred and fear rule us. We will only let it make us stand stronger and closer to one another.