It amazes me that after almost two years, I still reach for the phone to call you whenever something happens to me that I know you would be proud of. Everything I do, in some way, relates to something I have heard you say or something I've seen you do. After you passed away, I began to shape my life around the things we had done together, promising myself I wouldn't do them without you there.
Recently, I have begun to have a different mindset about losing you. Around the one-year mark of your death, I started to think about all of the opinions that I have, and how you've influenced me.
When I was younger, I spent every single Sunday in your company. More often than not, I would also see you throughout the week. It isn't hard to see how our values would line up because you were and will forever be my hero.
I get my strong sense of country and patriotism from you. I love our soldiers, our flag; and even though I really don't like birds much, I love our country’s bird, the Bald Eagle. You told me about your times in the Army, and although I was too young to understand how hard you fought for America, I understood that you wore your veteran hat, coat, and ring with pride. I am proud of who you are, and I am honored to be related to such a great man.
Although you have instilled values into me that I will never forget, I can also look into the mirror and see qualities of you in my own face. I have your nose, and your cheek bones, and although my smile comes from my mom, her smile came from you.
It's the time of year to express what I am thankful for, and this year I am realizing how thankful I am for my Papa. He taught me how to appreciate routines and organization. He taught me the importance of online shopping and QVC. My Papa taught me how to speak volumes with actions rather than with words because although he was a man of very few words, he was also a man of many courageous actions.
I am forever thankful for my soldier in heaven, because he taught me everything there is about being strong even when it is hard to so. Although I miss you every single minute of every single day, almost everything I do I makes you proud of me. I love you Papa, and two years without you has really been awful, but I'm growing and thriving. I'm becoming a better me because of everything you have taught me.