When a person deals with the loss of a loved one, the aftermath of that loss can oftentimes alter that person for the rest of their life. Although no loss is more or less significant than another, when a girl is faced with the death of her mother, her world is inevitably changed forever.
To the Girl Who Lost Her Mom,
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It goes without saying that I am incredibly sorry for your loss. There is not a person in the world that could ever replace your mother because your mother was your first best friend. She was the person you laughed with, cried to, and the woman that unwaveringly stood by your side no matter what. That in itself is such a gift, and a gift that you get to cherish for the rest of your life.
I know that it all seems unbelievably unfair, and that nothing makes much sense anymore, and that's okay. The most important thing you can do for yourself is take the weeks, months, and even years after your loss and grieve.
While you may feel the need to move on quickly and "get back to normal," you should remember that the normal you once had stemmed from a life that you shared with your mother, and as much as you wish it was, it's not the same anymore. Instead, now you get to take all those beautiful memories you have of her and create a "new normal". In each person that will be different, but with time you will eventually find your own.
You might also want to hide within yourself and build up walls to keep others out, but you need to see that you are surrounded by people that love you and are there to help you through this time. You just need to reach out. This is not a situation that you can deal with on your own, so let other people help. It is not a sign a weakness, but a sign of strength to let others shoulder your grief with you.
With that being said, you should also know that no matter how many people are around you to support you, you will still miss your mom like crazy, and again, that's okay. It has been seven months since my mother's death and not a day goes by that I don't wish I could call her to talk to her about the cool thing that happened in class or the fact that I forgot something at home...again. Those feelings of sadness and longing never truly go away, you just learn how to create a life around them.
The key when dealing with this life altering experience is not to get so caught up in your grief that you become blind to all the beauty that is around you. Eventually, you will need to let go of your anger and sorrow to make way for all the love and goodness this world still has to offer.
Go out with your friends and have fun, find your balance through yoga, or get immersed in a new hobby. Your life didn't end with hers and she would want you to live every day with an open heart and an open mind. Continue to make her proud because although she is not physically on this earth, she will always be with you deep within your heart.
Sincerely,
A Girl Who Lost Her Mother Too
