To the girl who doesn’t love the way she looks,
I’ve been where you’ve been. I understand how you feel when you cross a mirror in your bedroom and have nothing nice to say about yourself. I know what it’s like to avoid the scales and the refrigerator for days at a time. I completely relate to your current mindset, but I’m here to tell you that you can’t live like this anymore. I’m here to tell you that you have a long road ahead of you, but you are capable of pushing past these negative thoughts, and you are capable of being who you want to be outside of them.
Girls have developed these disorders, these illnesses, when a new and unnatural standard of beauty was proposed, one that couldn’t be obtained by girls without having to do unnatural things to reach it. Modern society encourages girls to look a certain way, a way that is absolutely unachievable. Super long legs, super skinny stomach, super curvy hips. This is not possible for everyone. This is not possible for most people. You are given a body type through basic biology, and you should never be forced to change it for anything.It’s OK to have your own body type, a type outside of pop-culture’s “ideal.” It is also OK to have the body type that is “ideal.” However, you create your own standard simply by being who you are; there is no one you need to live up to, and you should never let someone tell you otherwise.
I don’t love myself every day. When I was 15 I didn’t think I was going to make it to 18 without being constantly upset with how much I weighed, how I looked in my jeans, how I had to eat differently around my friends so that they wouldn’t become suspicious. I lived through years of “Do you weigh anything at all?” and “You need to eat more than what you already have because you are so skinny!” I know it’s not easy to let these comments go, and I know your situation might be a little different, but one day you will be able to free yourself from how others view you and it will be the greatest feeling. Just wait.
I’m not expecting you to love yourself every day. What I am expecting is that you try to. Trying is enough, and trying is going to get you through this. Love yourself and love your body. You can overcome this, and once you do, you can get through anything. Your life has meaning. You are worth something.
Whether you fight anorexia, bulimia, or extreme binge/purge eating, you are a warrior. Whether you’re fighting to get through remission or recovery, you are a warrior. You have the ability to get through this, I promise you. You are a survivor. I am stronger than I have ever been, and I know one day you will be, too.
You are the most important person in your life, and you need to start treating yourself as such. I encourage you to find the support system that you need, and the friends that will be there to help you through it. If you ever feel like you are alone, know that I will always stand by you.
Sincerely,
A girl who has recovered
