First things first, take a deep breath.
And another.
And another.
OK, are you ready now?
Dear Freshman Self,
Everything is OK, and everything will be OK.
You are such a caring, thoughtful, and courageous young woman and you are going to really learn how strong you are in the next couple of years. I know you feel lost and overwhelmed and are adjusting to a new place but please don't take it all so seriously. This time will fly by, I promise you.
You are worth so much. Please surround yourself with people who make you feel that. All your life you have had friends just because you didn't have many to choose from, but now the choices are endless. Be selective in who you surround yourself with. It is OK to not click with people and to choose to no longer have them in your life. This is your book and you get to choose the characters. Don't let the natural process of friends coming and going from your life leave you so distressed, this is a blessing. Truly wonderful people are waiting for you, and this is making room for them.
Let him go. Let the yelling go. Let the fighting go. Let the constant stress go. You will feel as if the weight of the world has been released from your shoulders.
When you do let him go (and you will because even as a freshman you still kick ass) enjoy the time by yourself for a bit. Don't jump into the arms of another because you aren't sure how to be by yourself yet. You will figure it out. You are capable, I promise.
If it doesn't feel right then get up and go. YOU CAN SAY NO. You can say no to any situation at any time. Does that make sense to you? Please let that really sink into your head. At any point in time you can choose to change a situation. Later on you will realize how you wish you had done this more. This is your life, stop being afraid to make decisions and confront people. If someone is being sh**ty it is not your responsibility to make them feel OK about it.
You don't have to do it all. You don't have to work three jobs. You don't have to stay up all night. You don't have to go to every party and do amazing in every class. You are adjusting and figuring it all out and that is OK. Take a moment to breathe.
Continue to try new things and put yourself out there. You will meet people this way. The insecurity of trying new things won't last forever. Thank you for the courageous decisions you made and for finally being yourself. Your personality finally came through freshman year and we have really come a long way because of it.
The mistakes you're making are OK, I promise I survived the aftermath.
Lastly, enjoy this time. You are blessed to be exactly where you are. This time will fly by, you will grow, and you will change. But for the meantime, just enjoy it.
Love You More Each Day,
Your Proud Senior Year Self
P.S- I get you may have started out with a major you didn't enjoy, but please try to figure this out ASAP, because switching majors is a pain in the ass.