Empathy

empathy |ˈempəTHē/ | noun

The ability to understand and share the feelings of another.

Dear Empaths,

I know you're out there, the world isn't as glum as everyone makes it out to be. Many people are filled with empathy and many don't know how to use it without getting hurt in the process. That's okay. You'll learn how to connect and help people in time, while still maintaining authenticity and connection.

Many things empaths forget, that they need to remember:

Be compassionate to yourself. Don't forget that you are human and make mistakes, and that all of the compassion you give to other people is also something you deserve as well. Keep your head high and remember that you can learn from this experience and walk away wiser and more compassionate than when you woke up this morning.

Cultivate your joy first, give only from your bounty. You can not give what you do not have. Unless you're a credit card. Focus on preserving your positive energy and love instead of carelessly giving it away leaving you with none. You'll end your day on a negative instead of recharging in the positive.

People can only save themselves, not everyone wants to get better. This is a lesson that took me a really long time to learn. I wanted to save everyone I met. It wasn't until I dated an abusive guy my sophomore and junior year that I realized not everyone can be saved. Even if I put every ounce of my soul into this person, even if I give them everything they ask for, even if I beg them to get their life together, if they do not want to, they will not. So, don't give up on people. Show them love and kindness, but don't drain yourself on them either. Learn your limits, and their intentions.

Establishing boundaries can irritate others. Do it anyway. You might be helping someone who may be going through a really hard time, but please maintain space. You do not want to harm yourself in the process of trying to help someone else. This is not selfish, it's called loving your soul, heart, and mind. Leave painful situations behind, and "just keep swimming".

When feeling strong emotions in a situation, ask yourself, “is this mine?” This particular one is the one I struggle the most with. I let other people's negative situations carry onto my emotional display usually because I care very deeply for them. My boyfriend was in a stressful situation recently, and I became quite stressed out due to it. I had to back up and ask myself if my stress was constructive to him, and if i was stressed out how would he feel comfortable coming to me to lean on me when times got hard? I had to calm down and emotionally back away from the ordeal and remember to be there for him. To others who struggle with this, just remember to ask yourself this question, "is this mine?"

Continue empathizing! The world needs some love and connection.

Sincerely,

Your fellow empath