We can talk all day about sexual harassment: what it does, how it feels, what it looks like, how to respond, etc. At the end of the day, I believe real life examples are really what help get emotion across a plane that words cannot.
Below are three examples of open letters -- personal occurrences that have happened to myself, a 21-year-old collegiate woman, in the past six months. Many people, both men and women, don't realize the capacity of sexual harassment and may overlook that it might be happening to them every day without them knowing. I live in a very small college town, and all of these events still managed to happen in a short amount of time. This happens everywhere and everywhere, and frankly, we're all running out of ways to handle it, so it should just cease to exist.
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Dear "Man in the Truck,"
I saw your truck slow down when it approached me on the sidewalk. I saw you tilt your sunglasses down off the bridge of your nose to allow yourself a better stare. I saw you crank your neck until its near breaking point, just to get a good look at my backside. I heard your obscenely loud wolf whistle out your rolled down window.
I'm so sorry I didn't acknowledge you. That was so rude of me.
Sincerely,
Girl Walking Home
"Nearly 95 percent of female respondents were honked at one or more times and 40 percent said they are honked at as frequently as monthly. Nearly 94 percent of female respondents were the target of whistling at least once and nearly 38 percent said it occurred at least monthly." - http://www.stopstreetharassment.org
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Dear "Creepy Facebook Guy,"
I'm really flattered you think I'm an "attractive woman." And even after the first, second, and third time I thanked you and graciously told you that I wasn't interested, I want you to know, I didn't change my mind on that decision. I know that we are taught to strive after whatever it is we really want, but if that thing doesn't want us back, you should probably just leave it (or in this case, the person) alone. I understand that we could get to know each other if I wanted, and I know you "have a feeling" that I'm a "sweetheart who's worth being this persistent for," but after the third time of reinstating my disinterest, can you please refrain from harassing me via social media?
Sincerely,
Girl on Facebook
"[Pew Research Center] also found that young women face vastly higher rates of online harassment in two of its most intense, dangerous and emotionally disruptive forms: sexual harassment and stalking.Twenty-six percent of young women told Pew that they have been stalked online (compared to 7 percent of young men)." - http://www.huffingtonpost.com
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Dear "One Date Guy,"
At first I thought you were incredibly sweet and attractive, but after our first date, I'm sorry to say, I lost interest. I changed my mind -- people are allowed to do that. I was open with you about my disinterest in furthering our dates and that I was not looking for anything more between us. I was blunt, but honest. I was up front, but sincere.
How ever many phone calls, voice mails, texts, and a bar run-in later, I found myself leaving my own home because I was too terrified you would knock on my front door and ask me the same series of questions. I understand there was a connection you might have felt that I did not, but the way you chose to handle the situation was not a mature nor safe way to handle your emotions.
You shouldn't have to try and seek out ways to contact me. Isn't it a message enough that you have strong difficulty in finding a single way to speak to me?
Sincerely,
Disinterested Girl
"Repeatedly receiving unwanted telephone calls, voice, or text messages was the most commonly experienced stalking tactic for both female and male victims of stalking (78.8% for women and 75.9% for men)." - http://www.wgac.colostate.edu
