So, you finally graduated from 11 years of Catholic school and uniforms, and now you're finishing up your freshman year at public school, a.k.a. the jungle. I know you’re like I was when I started, quiet and shy, and that’s okay! I know you want to break out of your shell like I did, but take your time––it took me two whole years.
So, baby girl(s), whether you're a freshman or a senior, here are some things to keep in mind and keep you sane during high school on the five main point where problems lie: yourself, school, friends, boys, and family.
On You
Yeah, you've got pimples and yeah, they suck—sorry to disappoint you, but it’s not going to change. All you need to know is you're definitely not alone in this. Just keep washing your face at least once a day and always, always take your makeup off at night (I keep a package of face wipes on my nightstand).
Most of the diets you’ll hear about are dumb and/or unhealthy. Don't ever cut out a whole food group and talk to a nutritionist before you make any drastic changes. Take care of your body—the habits you start now will determine how you'll look when your metabolism catches up. Eat well, exercise, drink lots of water. Remember: Everything in moderation. Also, you're body will eventually grow into itself. Don’t ever be ashamed of the way you look; everyone has awkward stages.
I know maybe the “popular girls” are all wearing that one shirt and they're all really into that one show. You don't have to be. You wear whatever the hell you want, and you watch whatever the hell you want. Let them do them, you just keep doin' you (because you're perfect and I love you).
On School
Uh….yeah, this one sucks and it is only going to get harder. Grades are super important and I know Mom and Dad tell you this every day, but they are. Grades are (unfortunately) what has the biggest impact on determining your future. The weekends are there for social activities. Keep your nose in the books during the week and you won’t fall behind, you'll feel better about yourself when you get those A's back.
Don’t be embarrassed to ask for help or get a tutor. I would've failed half my classes if it weren't for tutors and extra time in the classroom working with two different teachers on how to do a geometric proof (and I still don’t get it).
On Friends
Always remember the people that have been there for you and be honest and respectful to everyone. If they're not nice to you, do yourself a favor and don’t stick around to take their shit.
Don’t judge a book by its cover; give people a chance, they can surprise you. Half of my friends today are people I would never have expected to get along with.
On Boys
Heartbreak happens and it sucks, but I’m always just a call away and I’ll come the next weekend, and we can watch "The Other Woman" and I’ll spoon-feed you Ben and Jerry's Chocolate Therapy until your teeth hurt.
But after that, okay, get ready… here’s the biggest piece of advice I can ever give: He's not worth it. Second biggest: Don’t dress for him, or any other guy. And the third (and most important): if you're not comfortable with it, say no––you don’t owe him anything and you don’t have to prove anything. Also, I swear if he touches you… I will know, and he’s dead, got it? (Jk…[not really...])
On Family
Mom is crazy, that’s no secret, but college taught me she’s my best friend and my biggest supporter, so don’t go too hard on her, she only wants the best for you. Make sure you make time for her, she loves trips with her girls shopping or to the movies and she has the best advice. Also, she’s not stupid, so you can try your best to lie, but she’s got spies everywhere and she’ll either see right through you or find out later. Either way, you’ll be in trouble, so just play it safe.
Dad won’t stop pushing you in sports, or choir, or school, or anything. He’s hard that way, but it’s only because he knows you can succeed. We all tend to underestimate ourselves; Dad doesn’t. He knows what we’re capable of, but tell him to lay off if you really can’t take the pressure and need some space (I suggest asking firmly but respectfully, and maybe a couple times).
We love you so much. Don’t forget that. Mom, Dad, your other sisters, your 1.2 million cousins, and aunts and uncles, and me––we will never not love you. Every one of us is here to pick you up when you need it, or hang out when you’re bored, so don’t push us away.
High school is a fun and terrifying roller coaster and you’ll probably go crazy a couple times. That’s fine, that’s normal. The key is to make the most of every day.
The real key though, is to not forget to treat yourself sometimes. Grab your favorite book or plop in front of the TV with the dogs and a bowl of double chocolate ice cream and just chill out. Or go shopping( 5-for-$27 panties will save you).
