I have loved Grace St. Luke's Episcopal Church ever since I was a little girl –– when I believed that the architecture and stained glass windows were reminiscent of Hogwarts, and the familial atmosphere made me, an outsider to their congregation, feel right at home.

When I attended a service with my grandparents this Sunday evening, I mused on the beauty of this place once more. As I laid my cupped hands out, I admired the gracefulness behind such a gesture. There is something quite humbling about looking across at those who surround you, all with arms outstretched in the same position. The sight of people well above the age of thirty, making the effort to get on their knees exemplifies the value and thoughtfulness of such a posture, in addition to its overwhelmingly vulnerable qualities.

I have always been a fiercely stubborn girl. My closest friends can attest to this, for though I have grown and changed through the years, that part of myself has been steadfast. Though I know how to function in groups, to speak well and maybe even charm others, I prefer time alone. I am an introverted soul, independent almost to a fault, always wishing to tackle whatever challenge I face of my own accord and in my own way.

I will never forget my senior year of high school, when my best friend had to practically wrestle the work for our literary magazine out of my hands. "Go take a nap", she said. "I can help you with this, it's what I'm here for."

At those moments in which, God forbid, I need to ask for help, I am often at a loss for words.

For me, outstretched arms and cupped hands signify not simply acknowledging vulnerability, but furthermore embracing it, and no matter how old I get, that will always be a frightening concept.

The open hand simultaneously represents both the offering of help and the desire for it. The duality of the gesture suggests that supporting those in need and being the one in need of support are perfectly intertwined.

As my outstretched arms await communion and breaking bread with Christ, I realize that no matter how long I go between these moments, its beauty remains intact. My faith, a painfully overlooked aspect of my life, is always there waiting to be expanded and furthered.

In the day-to-day hustle and bustle of my life, I am preoccupied with my future, in particular the professional ambitions I have. Future means career, and thinking about what lies ahead entails a corresponding weight on my shoulders that my professional goals are not attainable, that I am not deserving of them.

With open hands and open arms, we may all better confront what lies ahead. To persevere in the face of adversity, we must embrace that which makes us vulnerable and afraid, to uncover what makes us feel humbled and secure.

Open hands and open arms –– forever out of my comfort zone, but forever within my reach.