Dear Incoming First-Years,
This school year, you will see a whole new world, shining, shimmering, splendid (but also scary, sad, and nostalgic), a new fantastic point of view (but also ones you have trouble agreeing with or understanding), and indescribable feelings. The goal of this letter is to make you aware of the experiences or feelings that you may or may not come across throughout your first year of college, and provide you with concrete solutions to overcome these feelings. I will be starting my second year at Pomona College, a liberal arts school in southern California––and here is my spur of Disney-inspired advice that I hope will benefit you and your community.
1. ♫ Sing Hakuna Matata around the burning measuring sticks of society ♫
By nature, we tend to compare ourselves and use each other as measuring sticks to determine our excellence. I wish I could make a campfire out of societal measuring sticks, and sing Hakuna Matata as we gather around the burning wood. Alas, my wishes do not always come true. However, we can choose to avoid these measuring sticks.
Here are some practical ways we can STAY AWAY from those bloody sticks: Do not ask or answer frivolous questions regarding others’ scores on exams, grades in classes, and time spent studying (something I was guilty of); find a constant study space where you feel comfortable and there is no additional layer of pressure; focus on what you have by keeping a gratitude journal; and identify negative comparative thoughts to replace them with positive ones through self-talk and forced smiles (Fake it till you make it turns out to be a good strategy)
2) ♫ Remember Ohana. Ohana means family. Family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten ♫
Many of you will be moving away from home for the first time, and while some of you may be excited at the prospect of having your own room and having control over how to manage your time, others may be horrified– or a mix of both. Do not forget where you came from. Your family helped you get to college (literally and/or figuratively) and will continue to be there for you, through the good and bad (even if in the bad, it means having to accept a consequence or long lecture first).
How to remember Ohana: have a consistent, scheduled time in your agenda to call your loved ones at least once a week; make a Groupme chat with your high school friends or family, and keep them updated on what you’re up to; and send souvenirs of your respective college (or take pictures of the souvenir if you can’t afford them!)
3) ♫ Hercules once said, “I am on my way, I can go the distance. I don’t care how far, somehow I’ll be strong”♫
Good advice Hercules, but can you expand on somehow I’ll be strong? I remember when the insecurities got to me, affecting both my physical and mental health. In the midst of negative thoughts, I tried to be strong.
Here are some actions I took that, hopefully, will also provide you with a refreshed sense of resilience: I went to the Christian Friday Fellowship (in which the theme for the semester happened to be mental health); I called my mom constantly to rant or vent; I searched for a therapist to help keep me balanced (there is no stigma in seeking out mental health resources! People who do so, do it out of ignorance and lack of knowledge.); and I took a Yoga PE Course
4) ♫ Look for the bare necessities, the simple bare necessities, forget about your worries and your strife. ♫
This doesn’t mean completely forget about your studies, but remember to stay grounded. Admittedly, I shifted my balance far too much to the academic side throughout my first year of college, an action that proved to be unhealthy and perhaps even a hinder to my academic performance, since I was putting far too much pressure on grades.
Here’s what Baloo the bear would say: designate a time to do the things you like, so that you can work more efficiently during your studying period; form support groups within your community (because we are all in this together) and do not be afraid to ask for help.
Wish you all the best,
Jennifer Acevedo plus all of her Disney Friends
