Self-love is the most important thing you can give yourself. It triumphs over good academic marks, your commitment to athletics, how well you know the words to Macklemore and Ryan Lewis’ “Can’t Hold Us,” and how quickly you can eat a pizza from Domino’s even though you meant to go to bed an hour ago. Self-love teaches patience, respect, kindness, and confidence; it validates everything you are without shame or guilt and confirms your right to happiness even at the lowest points in your life. If you love yourself without restraint, you will always find comfort in your own presence. Do not limit yourself by society’s standards for beauty or intelligence or success. You are worth more than the opinions of other people, and your merit as a human being does not depend on the size of your clothes or how many people liked your latest Insta.
Be gentle. Monitor the way you speak about yourself. If you ever notice you are criticizing yourself in front of others, take it back. It’s harder to help the way you think than it is to help what you say, but it’s possible to change the negativity in your head over time. Be patient here too. If you’re thinking negative thoughts, don’t say them out loud, ever. Negative thoughts succumb to negative perspectives which perpetuate a cycle of self-loathing and defeat. If the negative thoughts are occurring subconsciously, put in a conscious effort to think positive thoughts. Counterbalance yourself. Tell yourself you’re worth it, and suddenly, you’re worth it. You don’t need anyone to validate your self-worth or self-confidence.
Love yourself enough to set standards for how you should be treated. Set standards for the treatment you’re willing to accept from other people so that when you encounter someone who is critical of you, you will know when to say, “I do not accept the way you are treating me.” When you have boundaries, it becomes easier to walk away from situations that make you unhappy. It’s okay to distance yourself from people who don’t make you feel good about yourself; don’t ever apologize for your confidence or personal strength. You are beautiful and bold, and your self-assurance is admirable. The only opinion of yourself that matters is your own, so there is never a need to second-guess how much you deserve. You are the sun and moon and stars. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
