It certainly comes as no surprise that we all endure days of doubt, dread, hardship, and anguish. The antidote for withstanding, however, is not to project this on another through unnecessarily hateful, even negligent means.
"Kill 'em with kindness," they say.
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Possibly an over-utilized idiom, yes, but an idiom quite underrated in its actual denotation.
As humans, we often have an inability to take on the perspective of another individual, almost to the extent of the egocentric, pre-operational stage of a developing child. We forget to realize the battles that other people may be facing, because we fail to reframe our perspectives: we fail to be transcended of our own selfishness.
Kindness is one of the only remedies that can rectify the cruelty so prevalent in our world, but its power is too often minimized. Why, though? Even for small, seemingly uninfluential acts, we must be aware that the effects are ceaseless.
It is only the pure and genuine kindness that counts, however. It is only the kindness pulled out of the depths of one’s heart that will ever change the cruelty of human nature the world succumbs to. How wonderful is it to witness a faint smile sprawl across someone’s face because of a simple act of kindness? You can see it. You can see it in their eyes. You can see it in the way their face crinkles up when they smile. How precious of a thing it is to lift someone up; to give someone the reassurance they need to continue on; to make someone forget about the negativity encompassing their world, even for a brief moment. Light is essential to fill this world of darkness. When acts of genuine kindness come purely from the heart, people’s lives are changed.
Here are some of the many acts of kindness you might consider adopting:
- Hug someone! It releases oxytocin, a chemical in the brain, which influences stress and anxiety levels, and plays a critical role in overall well-being.
- Smile. Even if you are having a bad day, smile at the person you just passed in the hallway; smile at your co-worker; smile at your boss; smile at the person at the drive-through window; smile at your dog. Just smile! In doing so, you will probably even feel a bit happier!
- If someone seems to be disoriented or perplexed, ask if there is anything you can do to help.
- Let people know that you hope they have a good day, even if you say it to them every single day and think you are being a bother.
- Offer your assistance. Seek out opportunities to better the world. Extending a helping hand is always a kind gesture!
- Eliminate profanity from your vocabulary, especially if it is a catalyst for further negativity, condemnation, or enmity.
- Remember your manners, always.
- If you are having a rough day, redirect your attention outward. Stop internalizing it all, and shift your focus to what you can do to help someone. This is the best distraction, and reminder that life is so much bigger than the temporal problems.
- Listen to what people have to say. Don’t just hear them speak, but truly listen to their words. You might be the only one willing to do so. Rid yourself of technological distractions; look them in the eyes, and be mindful of what they are communicating.
Acts as these can completely transform someone's day. They can help them realize that, though dark and dying, the world does have light. Though we are all very different from another, we are all united. Though we all dance to our own beats, they end up converging in the end: concluding on one note. We all have chaos lying beneath the surface that is so adeptly concealed. In all of the idiosyncrasies that comprise us, we are bound by a distinct truth. We want to be heard and lifted up in the midst of our battles. We want to feel that we are loved, cared about, valued, cherished, like our lives bear purpose. If we take the time to truly invest in people's lives, seek to understand them, and alter our perspective, the world could become more altruistic, and the darkness, slowly transmuted into light. In the wise words of Steven Covey, we must "seek first to understand, then to be understood."
So, my challenge to you is to cultivate compassion. Truly invest in the lives of others. Hug people--release that oxytocin! Be kind to those who are not, because they need it the most. Sow seeds of genuine love and kindness everywhere you go. Leave a trail, and do not be ashamed. Be so authentically kind to others, that all else in opposition becomes foreign. Be the light for others who may not see it yet, and most importantly, before judging someone or speaking from a cruel place in your heart, take the time to see the world through their eyes.
“No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.” -Aesop
Ephesians 4:32: "Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you."
