Why I'm Okay With You Deciding I Wasn't Good Enough | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Student Life

Why I'm Okay With You Deciding I Wasn't Good Enough

The people that are quick to walk away are the ones who never intended to stay.

343
Why I'm Okay With You Deciding I Wasn't Good Enough

If I could say one last thing to you, I would thank you. If you only knew what I feel today as I learn to do life without you. It took baby steps. I had to navigate through my day to day activities without you. I had to learn who I was again and not just who I was with you. Thank you for showing me how strong I truly am when I had no other choice but to be a strong and independent woman.

You left faster than you came. You made me feel like it was my fault. For the first few nights after you left me, all I did was lay in bed and figure out what was so wrong with me that you didn’t want me. I replayed every conversation we had leading up to the end and couldn’t quite figure out where things went so wrong. I waited for you to come back and apologize while telling me you regret the choices you made. I waited by my phone just to see if you still cared. In these moments, I finally realized you made me feel like I wasn’t good enough.

People always said you were a guy with good intentions, but I just want to know what your intentions were with me? I’d like to think it wasn’t your intention to leave me in tears feeling like I wasn’t good enough. Or it wasn’t your intention to make me hate my flaws since you made me feel unworthy of your love. Whether it was because I had standards you couldn’t meet or you saw me as the broken girl because of my past, it is still not an excuse to just decide one day you don’t love me anymore.

Leaving hurt enough, but when I saw there was someone new immediately after, I realized I simply wasn’t the girl you wanted. I didn’t meet the criteria of a girl you want. I wasn’t good enough in your eyes. She has something that I do not. At first I thought we’d be friends, until I learned that you had no place for me in your life. School, friends, and your new girl became your life. I didn’t fit. There is no room for me.

I thought moving on would be impossible. But the minute you treated me like a nobody, the minute you yelled, and the minute you played games… I was over you. Thank you for making it a lot easier for me. Thank you for showing me your true colors before I was in too deep.

The reason I’m okay with how you made me feel is because I’m okay with learning to love myself again. You have forced me to take a look at the deepest parts of myself and evaluate who I want to be and who I know I already am. You reminded me to make sure next time I know what I deserve and what I don’t. I learned to not dive in too fast and to let the love unfold one day at a time. I learned to not give any man my all, because that’s not his place. I need to first give God my all and let Him lead me to the right man that can have a place in my heart.

So, I’m okay. And when I think I’m not, I remind myself I will be. Time heals all wounds and I will now be able to work on myself FOR myself. You made me feel great and you made me feel awful. Those emotions have driven me to become a better version of myself and focus on loving myself.

Thank you.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

A Few Thoughts Every College Freshman Has

The transition into adulthood is never easy

9547
Mays Island
Courtney Jones

Today I started my third week of college at Minnesota State Moorhead. I have survived welcome week, finding my classes on the first day, and being an awkward loner in the dining hall. Even though I have yet to be here for a month, I have already experienced many thoughts and problems that only a new college student can relate to.

Keep Reading...Show less
college

"Make sure to get involved when you're in college!"

We've all heard some variation of this phrase, whether it came from parents, other family members, friends, RAs, or college-related articles. And, like many clichés, it's true for the most part. Getting involved during your college years can help you make friends, build your resume, and feel connected to your campus. However, these commitments can get stressful if you're dealing with personal issues, need to work, or aren't sure how to balance classes and everything else going on during the semester.

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

9 Reasons Why Friends Are Essential In College

College without friends is like peanut butter without jelly.

4217
Bridgaline Liberati and friends
Bridgaline Liberati

In college, one of the essential things to have is friends. Yes, textbooks, a laptop, and other school supplies are important but friends are essential. Friends are that support system everybody needs. The more friends you have the better the support system you have. But you also have someone to share experiences with. And don’t settle for just one or two friends because 8 out of 10 times they are busy and you are studying all alone. Or they have other friend groups that do not include you. Don’t settle for just one or two friends; make as many friends as you can. After the first couple of weeks of college, most friend groups are set and you may be without friends.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

The Power of Dressing Up

Why it pays to leave the hoodie at home.

3078
sneakers and heels
Sister | Brother Style - Word Press

For a moment your world is spinning. The phone alarm has just scared you awake and you’re flooded by daunting thoughts of the day ahead. You have three assignments due and little time to work on them because of your job. You’re running late because you’ve hit snooze one to many times after yesterday’s long hours. You dizzily reach for a hoodie, craving its comfort, and rush for a speedy exit, praying you will have time to pick up coffee. Does this sound familiar?

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

11 Signs You Live At The Library As Told by 'Parks And Recreation'

A few signs that you may live in the library whether you'd like to admit it or not.

2782
brown wooden book shelves with books

Finals week is upon us. It is a magical time of year during which college students everywhere flock to the library in attempt to learn a semester's worth of knowledge in only a week. For some students, it's their first time in the library all semester, maybe ever. Others have slaved away many nights under the fluorescent lights, and are slightly annoyed to find their study space being invaded by amateurs. While these newbies wander aimlessly around the first floor, hopelessly trying to find a table, the OGs of the library are already on the third floor long tables deep into their studies. Here is a few signs that you may live in the library, whether you'd like to admit it or not.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments