It’s okay not to be okay.

You’ve got 1,000 things racing through your mind all at once. So much to do and no time to do it. There’s always that one person, place, thought, or memory that keeps coming back.

You never really feel present. You’re not happy, and you’re not sad. Your heart is beating, and you’re alive, but sometimes you don’t really know what for. One minute you can’t stop smiling and the next you can’t remember what joy feels like. Some days you don’t even feel anything. Your body is moving but your mind is numb, and you're just going through the motions.

You feel alone, unloved, different. You think no one will ever understand. You don’t know where you belong and you’re not so sure there’s even a place for you.

You think your mind and body are betraying you. You pick yourself apart and focus on all the things you wish you could change. You hate the way you look, your voice, the way your nose scrunches up when you laugh.

You don't remember a time when you didn't feel this way. You look back at old pictures, and the memories feel so distant or even fake. Your past is foggy, and your mind is clouded.

Everyone says that things will get better. That time heals and you’ll have a complete turnaround. You won’t even remember a time when you felt like this. But this is hard to comprehend. They don’t understand. They can't. You think they’re just throwing words out there to make you feel better. And it’s not working.

But it’s okay. You can feel whatever you want to feel at that moment. You are a unique individual, and no one will ever fully understand the way your mind works. Your feeling of sadness might not translate to the same emotion someone else feels. Different things make you happy, angry, depressed, and afraid. Your triggers are not the same as the person sitting next to you.

Don’t let that discourage you.

Just always remember that your life is priceless and one-of-a-kind. Whatever you are going through isn’t bad enough to harm yourself or anyone else. You are stronger than your emotions, and you can handle your situation, but that doesn't mean you have to tackle it head on, right at this moment. For everything life has thrown at you where you thought you couldn't handle it...you did. Every situation that seemed like it was the end of your world or that you couldn't possibly survive it...you did. If you just continue to live your life at your own pace and cope in whatever ways work best for you, you will conquer your inner demons. It might not be today; it might not be tomorrow, but it will happen sometime.