"These years are going to fly by. Make sure you enjoy every second of it." I have heard this so many times but I never believed that it was true. Looking back, I cannot believe how fast my life has gone. It is still hard to belueve that I am nineteen and a sophomore in college. Just yesterday I was starting my first day of middle school. Life is short. I believe it now.

1. Kindergarten

Dylan is so cute! He is really nice. He even shared his Scooby Doo stickers with me. Those are my favorite! My friends make fun of me for liking a Chinese boy. I still think he is cute, though. Jonnae and Dylan forever!!

2. First Grade

Mrs. Fisher is the nicest teacher in the whole entire world! She always helps me with my spelling words and tells me that I’m doing a great job. She makes me very very happy. I bet all the other first graders are jealous because they don’t have a teacher as sweet as Mrs. Fisher.

3. Second Grade

Eww!! Why does Edwin have to have a crush on me? He is so weird and he always has crusty gunk on his lips. It is not cute. Everyone makes fun of him, which is sad. I wish I could just give him a makeover. I don’t understand why he likes me, though. I will never understand.

Mrs. Nievas took my Scooby Doo lunchbox away. She told me it was a distraction for the other students. I only play with it during lunch, not in class. How is it a distraction? She makes me mad.

4. Third Grade

My daddy doesn’t live with my sister, mom, and I anymore. They said that they were separating. Our house feels empty and big without him there. I don’t like it. Maybe they will get back together. My sister isn’t too hopeful.

Why did Mrs. Muniz tell the whole class about my parents? It made me feel very uncomfortable. Now all the kids ask about my parents and their separation. I don’t want to talk about it, but they keep bugging me. I wish they didn’t know.

5. Fourth Grade

I hate Mrs. DeSimone! Sorry, hate is a strong word. I really dislike Mrs. DeSimone. Every time I get an answer wrong in class, she will laugh and in a way make fun of me. Now I hardly raise my hand in class. She is a big bully. I told my mom about her and she went to the school to “straighten her out” (Whatever that means). After their conference, Mrs. DeSimone is not as mean to me anymore. She still isn’t nice, but she’s doesn’t laugh when I make a mistake and get an answer wrong. Thank God for my mother.

6. Fifth Grade

My mom, sister, and soon to be stepdad and I moved to North Carolina this year. I’m sad to leave my family in friends back in Florida. Our house is really pretty, though, and I cannot wait to start school at Pinewood Elementary.

I am so confused. Why is everybody here so… developed. I swear every single one of these girls are wearing padded bras already. I’m still sporting a training bra and these girls are a freaking C cup. What is in the water here in Mount Holly. And why does is everybody obsessed with having boyfriends. One girl asked me if I had one, and I said: “No, I’m waiting until high school or college to date”. She looked at me as if I had three heads. The only thing I’m focusing on right now is my schoolwork and cheerleading. I don’t have time to worry about a boyfriend. I’m 10 years old for crying out loud!

7. Sixth Grade

My mom did not want me to go to a public school for my middle school years, so she enrolled me into a Christian School. I was actually excited about going to this school. Since it is a Christian school, the kids were going to be super nice and welcoming.

Boy was I wrong. I was not welcomed at all. In fact on the first day of school when I walked into class, everybody gave me the evil eye. Strike number one. All of the new kids were assigned a buddy to show them around the school and to sit with them at lunch. My buddy is Latavia. She seems like a sweet girl, but when the class was over I didn’t see her anywhere. When it came time for lunch, I sat at the table she was sitting at. She and her friends did not talk to me or even look my way. All in all, though, the kids there made me an outcast. When I tried to talk to some of them they would just look at me weird and ignore me so I gave up. People would ridicule me, calling me fat and ugly. Even when I became a cheerleader, I was still the weird new girl that no one liked. Thank God for my English teacher Mrs. Alexander. She is my only friend. I know, it is not cool for your friend to be your teacher, but she is the only reason that I didn’t become totally depressed this school year.

8. Seventh Grade

Some would say that I am going emo, but I’m just expressing myself. Who cares if I wear black a lot of black or if my classmates are scared of me. I want them to be afraid of me. Maybe they will regret saying some of the stuff they said last year.

Mrs. Cody, my creative writing teacher, wants me to talk to our school’s pastor. She said she’s concerned about me because of my attire and about some of the stories I write. Seriously, praying for me and drenching holy water on my body isn’t going to change anything. Why does everyone feel the need to change me? I am just being myself. I wish everyone would just leave me alone.

I don’t care what anybody thinks about me. Screw this “Christian” school. Forget everybody who bullied me. This is my year and nobody is going to belittle me. If they do then we’re going to have some serious issues.

9. Eighth Grade

I guess I really am capable of having friends at this school. It only took two years. Looking back on it, I really was mean and stupid last year. This year is truly my year

Finally, the 8th grade Washington, DC trip. I have been looking forward to this all of middle school. I have a feeling that something amazing is going to happen. I am not sure what, but I have a good feeling.

It is the last day of the DC trip and I’m really sad to be going home. My best guy friend and I have gotten really close, though. We took one last trip to the park before we actually make our way back home. He and I decided to take a walk by ourselves. All we did was talk about the trip and other unimportant topics. All of a sudden he stopped walking and he started to lean in towards me. My mind was racing, I kept thinking is he really about to kiss me? We really about a centimeter about when his phone starting ringing. It was his mom. Really, like really?

10. Ninth Grade

My mom has finally decided to let me wear makeup this year. At first, I thought the whole idea of wearing makeup was stupid and superficial, but over the summer, I discovered the true artistry of makeup. It's amazing how many different looks you can create. It is like painting and the canvas is your face. I may consider going to cosmetology school after college. Who knows, maybe I have a career in makeup. Maybe I could do celebrities makeup, or do runway. That would be amazing. I wonder if it is really possible for to do it, though.

11. Tenth Grade

I am no longer at the Christian School. For some reason, they would not put me in any honor classes. I made the grade and passed the prerequisite, so I don't understand why I was put in regular classes. My mom was not happy about that at all and decided to pull me out of the school. I was devastated. I was leaving all of my friends and the cheerleading team which I loved. It was all so sudden. I had no time to process it. Maybe this is for the best.

I hate public school! I hate everything about it. Everyone is so different. I am not used to this at all. Why is her hair pink? Why does the cafeteria food smell bad? Why is there so many people in the hallways? Why does everybody cuss? Why is there only two pep rallies in the entire school year? Why is everyone chanting "freshman suck?" Why are there so many people making out under the stairwell? I am so confused. I hate East Gaston! I want to go back to my little private school. I don't belong here at all. Somebody, anybody, take me back!

12. Eleventh Grade

What is my purpose on this Earth? I mean right now I say I want to be a dermatologist, but I am not sure. I am starting to question what I am supposed to do. Is my true calling cosmetology? Or maybe I am mean to pursue writing. I am still trying to find myself. I thought I had my whole life planned out, but now I am just kind of confused and scared. I only have this year and next year, then I’ll be off to college on my own. It is exciting and terrifying and the same time. Thank God for my family. They have encouraged me to not be scared about the future. That whatever career path I decide to take they will be proud of me.

13. Senior Year

Thank God high school is almost over! Holy crap,I have been waiting for this year for the longest. Don't get me wrong I don't hate high school but I'm so ready for college. I still don't know what school I want to go to but I have time. Right?

I am sad that my cheer career is coming to an end. I don't want to think about it. However, I am so excited to be able to spend my final year cheering at Cheer Athletics Charlotte! I am also cheering for varsity at school again. Honestly, I could care less about school cheer, but it is kind of fun.

Graduation is coming so fast and I could not be any happier. For some reason, I'm not sad. I'm ready to leave this school and really begin my life. High school is over and I am so glad. It is bittersweet but sweeter. Peace out class of 2015.

14. College Year 1

It's crazy to believe that I'm actually a college student. Where did the time go? It seems like yesterday I was starting high school. As much as I love it at Winston-Salem State, I do miss high school. Lowkey. Okay, maybe highkey. I rushed my senior year instead of just enjoying it. I should have just lived in the present instead of rushing it. I miss the simplicity of my high school routine. I don't want to do that during my college journey. I am going to live and enjoy these years because I know it is going to go by so quickly. Life is way too short to wish it away.

College has grown me up in many ways. I have transformed into a much more independent woman. I am definitely not the same Jonnae that I was last year. I am really developing into the person that I know that I am destined to be and I am so excited about what God has in stored for me