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Confessions Of A Candyholic

I don't care what shape or size, just give me chocolate.

Constance Register

Oct 17, 2016

McNeese State University

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We all have that one friend that loves candy. Well, I am that friend. As a kid, I never loved candy much; I preferred something salty over sweets any day. As I have gotten older, I have learned to appreciate candy a lot more. I still love salty stuff just as much, but I believe salty and sweet tie for my preference.

However, I do not like all kinds of candy. I do not eat a lot of gummy candy. When I do, I prefer peach rings and Sour Patch Kids. The watermelon Sour Patch Kids are the best, and I think we can all agree on that. Am I right? I also do not chew gum whatsoever. Although, I don't consider gum a candy. Hard candy is pretty good too.

My favorite candy is chocolate.

I eat chocolate for breakfast sometimes. This morning, I ate M&Ms for breakfast, and it was glorious. I like dark chocolate, white chocolate, and milk chocolate. There are so many reasons I love candy but specifically, chocolate.

So, I wrote a little poem to express my love for chocolate.

Oh, chocolate,
So sweet and creamy,

Oh, chocolate,
So lovely and tasty

Oh, chocolate,
I hold you so dear to me
Sometimes I wake up and crave you
Then I realize its midnight
So I lie awake and miss you.

Oh, chocolate,
How I love you so
Promise you'll never leave me
Or treat me badly

Oh, chocolate,
Tell me something, will you?

You'll never give me a cavity, I hope.
You'll never give me a stomach ache
Or make me choke.

Oh, chocolate,
My dear,
We must keep this a secret
For I fear,
That my dentist will tear.

Oh, chocolate,
You fill my dreams
With a warm sweet bliss.

Oh, chocolate,
So sweet and creamy,
Promise that you'll be forever near.

Oh, chocolate,
KitKat, Twix, and M&Ms,
My go-to snacks for years.

Oh, chocolate,
Ghirardelli, Lindt, and Ferrero Rocher,
Only the finest of them all.

Oh, chocolate,
Crunch bar, Milky Way, and Rolo,
Caramel filled, marshmellow filled,
But never peanut butter filled,
Never with nuts.

Oh, chocolate,
How I love you so,
But now it is time for me to go.

Hopefully now you get the point of how much I like chocolate. I know I can't be the only one that loves chocolate this much.

If I am being honest, I really just l love candy. Hard candy and chocolate are two main staples of my diet. Maybe next week I will write on my love for hard candy!

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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Confessions Of A Candyholic

I don't care what shape or size, just give me chocolate.

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#Adulting is hard.

1. Taking care of yourself when you're sick

2. Making a to-do list

3. Planning your activities around the weather

4. Scheduling your own doctor’s appointments

5. Getting your own toilet paper

6. Making food without needing to ask your mom questions

7. Holding your tongue

8. Saving your paycheck (or your tax refund) to pay your bills

9. Balancing your checkbook

10. Going places alone

11. Packing your own lunches

12. Actually eating your vegetables...on purpose

13. Taking a multivitamin

14. Planning a life after graduation

Sometimes bigger isn't always better.

1. If something happens, everyone knows about it

2. Never getting to be invisible

3. Knowing every single thing about every single person in the town

4. New kids are a big deal

5. It’s hard to make new friends

6. On that note ... the dating pool is even smaller!

7. Teachers are weirdly close to their students

8. It forced you to make friends out of school

"I'm hopeless and awkward and desperate for love"

1. That Time He Tested Out His Flirting Skills and This Happened

2. When He Was Willing to Do Anything to Avoid Confrontation

3. When He Couldn't Handle Awkward, Emotional Situations

4. How He Reacted Whenever His Friends Ignored Him

5. All of the Times He Worried About His Failing Love Life

6. Whenever He Tried to Whip Himself Into Shape

7. How He Handled New People and New Experiences

8. Whenever His Friends Got Annoying, He Was Always the Voice of Reason

9. He Always Knew How to Jam

10. He Finds a Way to Make Any Situation More Fun

No, I can't help you.

1. When a customer wants to return a product, hands you the receipt, where is printed "ALL SALES ARE FINAL" in all caps.

2. Just because you might be having a bad day, and you're in a crappy mood, doesn't make it okay for you to yell at me or be rude to me. I'm a person with feelings, just like you.

3. People refusing to be put on hold when a customer is standing right in front of you. Oh, how I wish I could just hang up on you!

4. Having the same conversations over and over again! To be honest I really don't even want to talk to you right now, or have this fake ass smile on my face!

5. Always having to have a smile on your face. I promise I'm not as happy as I may look!

6. Customers not understanding that sometimes, mistakes happen. I am a human being, we all mess up sometimes!

7. Having the boss from hell, it's their way or the highway! Even though I did my job correctly and efficiently, if I don't do it the exact way you do, I'm a piece of shit.

8. Having coworker who don't help out, who bend the rules just enough to screw you over.

9. Having to be at work after closing because a customer is taking forever and half! Not like I'd like to go home or anything!

10. Having shitty hours and more shifts than you asked for. Just because we don't have enough workers, doesn't mean I want to pick up every shift that you cant cover, oh great boss of mine!

11. Not having time for a social life. It gets old saying, "I can't I have work..." Every day of the week!

12. Having that lazy costumer who can't do anything for themselves... no please I'll get that, it's no problem at all!

It's just my face, I swear.

1. When you meet new people, they automatically assume you hate them or are rude.

2. People are constantly asking you if you're OK.

3. After being friends with someone for a while, they confess to you, "I thought you were so mean when I first met you," or, "I thought you hated me."

4. You get told to smile more, but they don't understand how scary that would be.

5. You're always labeled as seeming "judgy."

6. Passing a friend with your RBF in full force and not realizing you just shot them a death glare.

7. Being sarcastic, but everyone thinks you're outright rude.

8. Not knowing how mean you really look until you see a picture of yourself in resting face.

9. Your apologies never sound sincere because of your emotionless face.

10. Your "mad face" scares you.

11. And, lastly, people are constantly asking you if you are happy or having a good time because you look bored to death.

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