Did you remember to remember that you are amazing? Well, if not, here is your refresher: You are amazing. Beyond comparison. A true treasure.
Now, where were we?
Ah, yes, fitting in.
Have you ever watched and wondered what all of everyone is doing? And why they seem to be doing it? And why you feel the need to act, speak, dress, think in a way that is similar and therefore widely accepted? And if it's all worth it, and if it's really you, and if you would be better off without it all? Or simply if there is a point?
Yeah. That. Seems everyone is doing way too much to win acceptance from surrounding people. And it seems like an elementary, half-important problem, but hear me out:
In eighteen, almost nineteen, years of existing, too many times have I heard the phrase, “Don’t leave me alone with my thoughts," or some variation of that sentiment.
It's an anxious, worrisome, sentiment—one that is at its base caused by a cycle of doing too much to fit in, which can lead to reevaluating and simplifying, which can lead to feeling boring or useless or broken, which then starts the whole thing over.
It causes questions and confusion.
It can start desolate, despondent dejection.
It can make you reevaluate who you are, making you more sure of yourself or more insecure.
As I touched on before, people tend to be anxious, comparative, defeatist, poisonous, self-deprecating, and generally focus on the negative. And when alone, do not take care of self, merely use time apart from other people as a time to reflect and worry, and, as a result, cause more harm than good. When really, time with yourself should be a way to remind self (humbly) that it is enough, trying, alright, perfectly perfect just the way it is—completely complete without others' approval—beneficial, kind, lovely, patient thoughts.
That’s why people are scared of their thoughts. They have not been taught to love their thoughts. They have not been trained in the way of patience with where they are at, physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, socially, artistically, intellectually, the list goes on and on and on because we are constantly dissatisfied with ourselves. Don’t deny it.
But dissatisfaction should not lead to turning to whatever it is that the majority is depending on from the majority; a paradoxical system of acceptance and approval. See, I don't believe that anyone can be content with themselves or be content with who others are—have avid, true appreciation for one without the other. And should also not cause us to give up, either. There is always room for improvement, self betterment, for and in spite of self. And it all starts with how you treat yourself in your own mind; Grace for self and grace for others.
An unknown artist said once, "Two things to remember in life: take care of your thoughts when you are alone, and your words when you are with people." Fitting in should be defined as contributing something that only you are able to bring to the table, a sort of heterogeneous goal. Because you are enough, a new definition of extraordinary, and exclusively you.