Throughout the school year, I've written down my thoughts in my phone notes. As the semester draws to a close, I thought I'd share one of my more personal memos. This poem perfectly captures my experience throughout my first year of college, and the changes I have gone through.
I also extend this message to the world as a whole. Not only is this poem an ode to my internal transformations — but it is also a reflection of how the world has changed, and the changes we as humans will continue to make. I hope you enjoy reading my thoughts, and I wish you an amazing LDOC!
Sierra Jones
I'm not a girl anymore I'm all woman now
Even my body's different
Sure I've put on a couple of pounds
I'm stronger and I like it
Growing more and more decisive
But I can still rile up a crowd
My minds getting sharper, thought it'd be harder
The only thing getting harder is trying to pin me down
Whether it's a thought or a plan I'm hard to read, in my own head screaming
"I AM THE MAN"
I've gotten braver, bolder, dare I say wiser
I understand myself without my mother as the sole adviser
And it's funny looking back cuz I understand everything so much better
I understand everyone so much better
It's really beautiful
Growing older
Realizing this is the way things are
And here are the ways I can change them
I told my mom a few weeks ago It's like a growing and a shrinking
A death and a birth
A laugh and a curse
Like a Phoenix (I know, a Phoenix analogy? Lazy writing)
But that's the way it feels when you're so happy you're crying
You're so proud of yourself you can't even believe it
Like up until now I wasn't really a sentient being
It's this feeling
Of being a greater force in the world
Something not everyone can see but they can always feel
Like the great northern wind
Or the flap of a butterflies wing
Knowing that we are all connected
And we all have the same song to sing
Sprinkled with different harmonies
And yes there's been a little dissonance
But watch me now, I've found my stride
I've cleared some distance
And I know now that when a tree falls in a wood yes you can hear it
The whole world stops for a minute
You're caught up in it
Back and forth,
Slow and silent
And with all the violence
That grows so tiring
And with all the pain
You want to erase
And with all the people
You stumble to catch when they fall
And to all the damage we cause on this little floating ball
And at night you stay up thinking about it
All the things you can't change
All the ways you would raise your offspring into a new nation
All the things you have done and the limitless pool of potential you face
Do we all get our dreams from the same place?
Will we ever understand the human race?
Will I ever not be scared of outer space?
And I think, how have I survived all this weight, the force of gravity,
Why doesn't it show upon my face?
Then I remember the mantra I've repeated my whole life
You choose to be happy
You control your own "vibes"
You can only control your own actions
If there are shadows then there must be sun
If there is an end there is a point where it had begun
You must have hope to be hopeless
You cannot lose focus
You must press on
For the evil that will rise
And the good that will come
For all my friends
And all my enemies:
To live this life We all need a little more positive energy
- S.J.
Keep it cute!
