We are all familiar with "The Notebook," the classic love story of Noah and Allie written by Nicholas Sparks. I myself have it pretty much memorized to the point I can quote almost every line in the movie, yet still watch it to the point where I get excited like I have never seen it before.
It’s not the fact that Ryan Gosling is so darn fine or anything like that which constantly pulls me back to watch it again; it’s the fact I love the romance, I love the story and I love the way it’s so simple. I love the way Noah takes care of Allie, reads her the book to tell her about their love story, and how they fight for what they want because they know that no matter what happens in life, they love each other and want to be together.
Maybe it’s the fact that it makes me sick to think about dating this day in age. It makes me sick because I know that dating like how it was in "The Notebook" and so many other romantic movies doesn’t happen and hasn’t happened for years now. It makes me sick to know that today’s standards for dating have dropped and are letting our significant others get away with so much compared to what we used to before.
What happened to the guy approaching a nice girl, going after her in a legal way (not using drugs), showing up at her doorstep, bringing her flowers, looking all nice and dressed to impress, taking her out to a nice dinner or a movie (original but you get my point), holding her hand on the way to the car, driving her back home, and saying, “I really enjoyed this tonight, I hope we can do it again soon”?
All that has been replaced by social media and people thinking it’s normal to not have those standards anymore. This ends up with relationships only lasting a short while. Why? Because we don’t have real relationships anymore. That guy approaching a girl in person turned into Facebook messaging, texting, Snapchatting “Hey you’re looking fine, lets hang out sometime ;)” or using some crazy pick up line that people now think is so adorable which in reality is just degrading towards women. Picking her up and bringing her flowers has turned into honking in the parking lot or driveway with a quick text saying, “I’m here, come out.”
Flowers? What? You would think that they don’t grow anymore with the lack of them now on the first, if any, dates. Dressing up and looking your Sunday best has turned into wearing whatever feels decent at that particular moment. Taking her out turns into taking her back to your place to get Chinese takeout and binge watch Netflix for a night, which might lead to a nice make-out session if you are lucky. Driving her back home, ha! It’s expected now that she will stay the night; I mean usually that’s the whole point in the first place.
I have never been one to date much; I have always stuck around with the same person for a while, and in this day that is crazy. I understand everybody should test the waters to make sure that is the person they want to be with, but even in this day that’s not normal to be with the same person for a long period of time.
But I’m happy. I feel like we need to go back to dating like "The Notebook," we need to start expecting and wanting more again. Not willing to give in and give everything the first night. We need to make them want us and fall in love. Yes, that word does still exist. We need to hum a favorite tune pretending it is playing in the background as we dance on a empty road, lay there watching the stop lights change from red to green, fight for what we want in life and for the people that make us so happy. Write a story of our love and read it to each other as we age to relieve the glory days. Send those handwritten letters to still show that the old traits of relationships still exist.
We need to expect more, be more, and want more. And by going back to the days of dating like the couple in "The Notebook," we could achieve that. Take out so much of what is normal now and replace it with what used to be normal. By doing that, I feel like society will be on a better track for dating and it would help the younger generations see what a relationship should be like rather then just idolize it in a movie.
