'Grab Her By The Pussy' Is Not Just Locker Room Talk To Me | The Odyssey Online
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Politics and Activism

'Grab Her By The Pussy' Is Not Just Locker Room Talk To Me

"I was visibly uncomfortable and walked away, but why didn’t I say anything?"

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'Grab Her By The Pussy' Is Not Just Locker Room Talk To Me
Autostraddle.com

I do not care about Trump or what your opinions of him are, the good the bad the ugly I am here to talk about the bigger picture. Please do not try to combat my comments with the age old rhetoric that he is not the only one who says/does things like this. Do not try to argue of Mr. Clinton’s infidelity and sexual assault accusations, you cannot justify one injustice by mentioning another. When you hold a position of power and prestige you are no longer held to the same standard as those around you. You wouldn’t hold a surgeon to the same standard as a three-year-old playing Operation. As you all know, Trump is our new president. Before getting elected a recording of him surfaced explaining how he can take advantage of a woman and her genitals because when you're famous “you can do anything”. Many of you argued this was locker room talk but until you live in the reality of sexual assault, I guess comments like these are permissible. I understand Trump may or may not be a rapist or this terrible guy that people make him out to be but there are realities that people need to face. When you see a person in power that you look up to, you often agree with what they say because you trust them as a person, sort of like when you vote based on your parents’ choice because you believe they would make the right one. So if Trump was your parent and he told you it is okay to take advantage of a girl just because you have power over her is completely absurd and breeds rape culture. Your parents say, “Do as I say, not as I do”, but what if your parent is saying it and doing it? I know this is a hard theory to grasp, and you swear by the fact that you formulate your own opinions, but it is okay to want to follow and abide by what you think a good person does. I am sure it was not Trump’s intention for this to surface or to breed a rape culture at all, but it did. When you are telling young men it is okay to take what they want from a woman and ask for consent later, if at all, is absolutely ludicrous. He did not verbally have to say, “Take what you want from a woman, because she will be too afraid to say no.” All he had to do what make that statement and people drew their own conclusions.

When I was 15 I had sex with a boy that I was too drunk to say no to. And when I said no he told me it would be fine. He took my innocence, yet I blamed myself.

When I was at a club a guy groped me, but I left it be because I was too afraid to deal with the confrontation. I was visibly uncomfortable and walked away, but why didn’t I say anything?

When I was drunk at a party a guy took advantage of the situation and instead for telling me to go to sleep, he slept with me. Why did I drink so much that night?

When my brother was sick in middle school and I had to walk home alone boys followed me cat-calling me and the more I ignored them the angrier they got. I know I was scared but, why didn’t I tell them to stop?

Now you can easily make these my fault asking what I was wearing, why I was drinking, or if I ever said the words no or stop. I blamed myself enough for the both of us. But that is not the point I was a child. A child. When I first experienced what it is like to feel uncomfortable where a man was present. I was too afraid to say no most times and just went with the misfortunes that were brought upon me. I blamed myself for so long because if I just stood up, if I just confronted the situation, maybe those things would have stopped. I was scared and for good reason. Females every day are hurt and/or killed for rejecting men, for saying no, for speaking up. So when Trump says he can grab girls “by the pussy”, he is playing on their vulnerability and their necessity to survive. Yes, she could have told him to stop, but what would have been the consequences? Telling people it is okay to take advantage the fact that a girl doesn’t verbally say no breeds rape culture. That is why it is not locker room talk to me. My pussy is not yours to grab.

If she is drunk, don’t take advantage bring her home.

If you are at a club it is okay to dance with girls, but that is not a free invitation to feel her up.

Just because she doesn’t say no, doesn’t mean she wants to.

If you would feel awkward if a girl did it to you, don’t do it to a girl.

If you are cat-calling a girl it does not make you more desirable, just creepier.

Girls have done their part to eliminate rape culture, now it’s your turn.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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