"Weren't you lonely growing up?"
I am the one and only child of my parents, and might I say I am not the stereotypical spoiled brat. People are quick to pin the spoiled term on those who were raised alone, for it is assumed that they received a great amount of attention and anything they ever asked for during their upbringings. I can happily say my parents said no to me more than a time or two!
Ironically, I feel flattered when people don't recognize that I am an only child right away. It's like being sibling-less automatically throws you in the selfish pool. "You don't seem spoiled at all," people often say, "You're so caring and nurturing, you couldn't possibly be an only child." I find it interesting how our society associates negative behavior and personality attributes (like narcissism and selfishness) with being an only child.
I get asked all the time if I wished I had siblings. When I was younger, I jumped at the chance to say yes. Perhaps I thought my parents would have granted my wishes and had a mini-me. But now that I'm older and more self-aware, I think hard about the question before answering. I am who I am because of my upbringing and my life experiences, and I know that if I had a sibling I would not be the same person. I know that having another member in my small family would have put a strain on my parents, and I may not have had nearly as many extracurricular opportunities.
I cannot lie, I do yearn for the special bonds that culminate from a sibling relationship, but oftentimes I feel that I have those pseudo-sibling bonds with extended family members, like my aunts and cousins, and with some of my best friends. There are people in my life that I would do anything for, regardless if they share my blood.
I view my sibling-less upbringing a little more positively than most. I had the opportunity to develop maturity at a young age as well as find my true independence, which I've learned to maintain throughout my life. I've learned to be comfortable being by myself. In all honesty, after about 15 minutes of alone time I might start talking to myself, but someone once told me it's okay to talk to yourself as long as you don't talk back! Throughout my 21 years of life, I've developed strong relationships with both my mother and father. Although sometimes I wish they would stop caring about me for five minutes, it is an amazing feeling to know I have parents who will always be there for me and always care.
Now, being an only child may sound like a lonely or spoiled upbringing, but when I reflect on my experiences, I am eternally grateful for how my journey has transpired. I am the one and only child of my parents, and I wouldn't have it any other way.
