In less than a month, I am being forced to say goodbye to my teenage years as I celebrate my 20th birthday. But, to be honest, I just don't think I'm ready for that kind of commitment to adulthood. By 20, I feel like you should be able to survive on your own with a general understanding of most basic human skills. Well, here are 15 texts I've sent my mom in the past two weeks alone, proving that I indeed do not have that understanding, and that I am indeed not ready to be an adult.
1. "Do you remember where I got all my good jeans from?"
2. "Who do I call about a dead cat on the side of the road?"
3. "Why are all the American flags only half raised today?"
4. "What do I wear to a rehearsal dinner?"
5. "How long does mac n cheese stay good in the fridge?"
6. "Will you make me an eye doctor appointment for this weekend?"
7. "Will you go with me to the eye doctor this weekend?"
8. "What size pajama pants should I get from Old Navy?"
9. "Do you think I have ADD?"
10. "Is a denim dress too summery to wear right now?"
11. "How long does it take to defrost frozen chicken?"
12. "How long do I cook said chicken?"
13. "How do I know if my chicken is done?"
14. "What do I do if my oven catches on fire?"
15. "What should I put on a burn?"
16. "How would I know if I have pink eye?"
17. "What kind of turkey should I buy?"
18. "Why does my brake light keep coming on?"
19. "Do you have to rinse pasta?"
20. "How would one go about cleaning a bathtub?"
Special shoutout to my mom for always saving the day answering these questions (and many, many others) with love, sincerity and very little sarcasm. What would I do without you?
