I have learned a lot about myself since I started university. I don't know how to manage my time, I don't know what I want to be when I grow up, and I certainly don't know everything there is to know about life. Granted I am only a freshman and I still have my entire life ahead of me, but I'm still figuring out who I am. And that's okay! A lot of people tend to think that they need to know exactly what they want to do with the rest of their lives before starting university. It seems as though declaring a major determines your fate. But I am here to tell you that that is not the case. It is perfectly okay to not know what the next 10 years of your life will consist at as a senior in high school.
My freshman year here at Baylor University has been quite an experience. I am still learning how to manage my time and it is the second semester. In the beginning I thought that I was the only one who was struggling. I assumed that everyone else had their whole lives planned out and I was the only one who was questioning every decision I was making. It took a while for me to realize that most of my friends were experiencing the same feelings I was. University life was nothing like I imagined it to be. The way that it had been described to be was not like I had been experiencing. I often wondered if I was doing the right thing; if university was truly the right life choice.
I now know that just because something is difficult does not mean that it is not for you. It takes time to get things right and you will not always do perfectly on your first try. Just because you do not make an A on your first exam does not meant that you won’t ever make an A. I have learned that overcoming the initial disappointment of a bad grade or mistake and using it to your advantage is the best way to go. If you sit around and be upset about something, you will always be upset because nothing will improve if you don’t fix your mistakes.
If you are experiencing some of the things I have experienced, I want to tell you that you are not alone. I have always thought that I was the only one to ever experience any emotions that I have had. The sooner I realized that everyone around me was experiencing or had experienced the same feelings, I was more at ease. Most people are just really good at covering up their emotions, which is why you don’t judge a book by its cover because it doesn’t truly tell you everything that is inside. The only way to truly know is to read it.
I certainly do not have everything under control and I am still learning new things about myself every day. Figuring out yourself and what you need to do to be a better person or a better student is the first step. I definitely still have a long way to go but I have a great support system and many people who I can talk to that relate. And so do you! Because you are NOT alone.