It seems like the second you enter your 20s, everyone on your Facebook feed is getting married and having babies. I'm happy for everyone who wants that for themselves, but that is absolutely not the case for me.
I've got way too much life to live. I've only been out of high school for three years, meaning I've only been outside of my hometown and my parents' home for a pretty short period of time. I'm still figuring out who I want to be, and there's no way I want to bring a baby into the picture before I even know who I am.
I'm still in college, meaning I'm in an incredible amount of debt that I honestly just try to not think about. I have to balance working full time and attending classes full time, leaving me with just enough to pay all of my bills and still have some money to survive. There's absolutely no way I could support a baby during this time of financial strain.
I definitely don't have baby fever whatsoever. I know that a baby would disrupt the plans I have for my life, and I know that there is no way in hell I am ready to be a mom at my age. Lots of women are and succeed at it, but I definitely could not.
I don't have a baby Pinterest board where I gush over them, I don't wander the aisles of Target and gawk at the tiny clothes, I don't dream of driving them to soccer practice in a minivan. I don't ever want a minivan, let's get that straight.
At 21, I like babies at an arm's length. I like to go see my little cousins and then be able to go home and be by myself. I like my maternal instinct to be pretty much nonexistent at my age.
I don't want to put my future children in a tight spot financially if I don't have to, and if I had one now, I would. My mom had me around the age I am right now and she absolutely kicked ass, but it was definitely tough on her. I will always love and admire her for the immense strength she's shown me time and time again throughout my life. She does want grandchildren, though, but she knows it's best for me to wait.
I might want kids one day, but that is definitely much further in the future than now. Having a baby at 21 is definitely not on my radar whatsoever. It's honestly as far off of my radar as it could be. I need to get myself into a more secure spot financially and professionally before I bring another life under my responsibility. I want my degree, I want a job, and I want to be able to provide for that child as much as it deserves.
