Frat guys often get a bad rap, and while sometimes they deserve it, there are definitely instances in which we're reminded that frat guys are just normal people who can be really great sometimes.
I asked 11 college girls to tell me stories of times frat guys have gone above and beyond and restored their faith in college guy-kind. Here's what they had to say:
1. The booty call turned beddy bye
"I met this guy in a frat party that I went to early sophomore year. We exchanged numbers but nothing really happened. I went to his frat's party later that week and I got pretty drunk. I couldn't find my friends and I just wanted to go home so I drunk called him a bunch of times. He was actually somewhere in the house and I was probably willing to do stuff I would later regret since I was really wasted. But he just gave me water, even made me some quesadillas, and walked me all the way to my dorm and made sure that I was safe and told my roommate what happened. Then he texted me the next morning asking how I felt and I thanked him for everything. We don't really talk anymore but if we see each other on campus, we'll say hi to each other."
- 20, Santa Clara University
2. Starting them early
"Got me water when he saw that I was too drunk haha (he was a pledge though so I don't know if that counts)
- 19, Santa Clara University
3. Love changes minds
"My boyfriend is in a fraternity and everything about him has restored my faith in college boys. At least, just my faith in one college boy, haha! He proved to me that frat boys aren't all rude, self-centered jerks like I'd previously believed. He's so sweet and truly cares about me, plus he's the best friend I've ever had. I love seeing his dedication to his fraternity and am so appreciative of the friends he made and the lifelong support he has from them. Meeting him definitely made me rethink Greek life a lot."
4. Doing the heavy lifting
"They helped me move my stuff up to my dorm on move in day. I also have some frat guy friends who are really good guys"
5. The good Samaritan
"I was at a frat party and this guy approached me and was like 'hey can you please help me? I found this girl really drunk and she keeps saying she needs to go to the bathroom and needs help in there but I don't think it's appropriate that I take her, could one of you girls please take her?' I'll call an Uber for you to take her home too" it was the most respectful thing ever, he did the right thing in getting help and not crossing a line."
- 20, Santa Clara University
6. Stop buying into reputations
"Frat guys are nice? They don't just do nice acts but most are genuinely nice guys. Everyone stereotypes them in college as being the assholes but in every group whether they are in Greek life or not, there are assholes. Everyone parties in college and although some may believe that frat boys create an unsafe environment, I have felt less safe at 'GDI' [Goddamn Indepdents] parties than fraternity parties. For example, I have always been offered to be walked home in a non-creepy way from a party by 'frat guy' rather than at non-Greek parties. A more specific story that comes to mind has nothing to do with the stereotypical partying that frats seem to be grouped into. A great friend of mine was gong through a hard time and both of us were good friends with many guys from one particular fraternity. Their nominations for sweetheart were coming up. They immediately nominated her and she won with no competition. This immediately lifted her spirits and she was able to feel like she was a part of another family when she needed it the most. I know that frats get a bad rap but really college drinking culture in general is the bigger problem. Stop blaming fraternity men for the problems of a whole campus."
7. Making sure you get home OK
"I was really drunk at a frat party years back and one of them decided he was taking care of me so he sat me on the porch during this big party and sat and talked with me for close to an hour before my ride showed up. He was very sweet."
8. The open door policy
"When I was too tired to go home after dancing until 4 a.m., this really sweet guy let me sleep on his fold out couch, gave me blankets, a fresh pillow, and a fresh t-shirt! Was sound sleep until pretty late the next day and I felt very safe. This frat is also very accepting of LBGTQ (multiple guys in this frat are out as homosexual)."
- 19, Emory University
9. Standing up against rape culture
"I wrote an article on the frats at Ohio University who defy the stereotypical frat boy through their #metoo signs. The fraternities involved make it clear that sexual assault/harassment is not condoned or deemed as 'cool,' although plenty other frats have been seen to disregard such issues. The OU boys are fighting back and denouncing rape with such signs that say, 'Stand with survivors,' 'Consent is BAE #beforeanythingelse #athenstogetHER,' ''No' does not mean 'convince me,' and 'It is not consent' if they are too afraid to say no."
- 19, Stony Brook University
10. The vom and rally
"I was at a dayger (day party) one time and I'd had a good-sized breakfast before hand, which was great and all until I needed to yak. I went over to one side of the backyard and was standing there looking nauseous until one of the frat guys who was throwing the party told me to 'pull trig,' that it was OK, and that I'd feel a lot better after I did. I threw up in his backyard, he gave me a high five, and I was able to go back to enjoying the party. I don't even know who he is but he made me feel less ashamed and embarrassed."
- 20, Santa Clara University
