It's almost 2019, which means many people are coming up with New Year's resolutions and ways they want to better their habits or lives in general. In my case, I am always the person who is really good at following through with my resolutions - for about the first three weeks. This year, however, I feel the need to focus on something more than merely a flimsy resolution that I know I will probably fail at miserably. Throughout this year, I've been thrown curveball after curveball when it comes to figuring out who I am and who I should surround myself with. Moving away from home has definitely helped me in figuring out who I am, but I still struggle a lot with the kind of people I want to surround myself with. Instead of making a "resolution" for 2019, I want to start focusing more on myself and my own goals, rather than focusing a massive amount of time and energy on people who simply don't matter.
Although my high school graduation happened months ago, some people never remember that it's over. It's been a tough pill to swallow, but I've realized that these kinds of people exist everywhere. No matter where you go or how old you are, some people are stuck in the past, and this isn't your battle to fight. It can be extremely easy to want to help people change or grow out of their past, but sometimes you have to take a step back and let them figure it out for themselves. As someone who always wants the people around me to feel happy all the time, I can speak from experience when I say that it takes a toll on your own mental wellbeing. You can't fix people, but you can focus on fixing yourself. This year, it's time I focused on making me happy and not worrying about how it will make others feel.
There's also people who you'll meet in life that don't mesh well with your personality, and that's okay. I've struggled my entire life with wanting everyone to like me, but the unfortunate truth is that this is not possible. You will meet people that don't like you or that are just not suited for your character, and there is nothing wrong with that. Just because someone seems popular or "cool" to those around you doesn't mean you have to be their friend. Surround yourself with people who are better suited for your personality type and who make you happy. Genuine friends are hard to come by, so don't pass them up because they may not be the most "popular" option.
This is probably the aspect of life I need to work on the most: just because others are doing it doesn't mean you have to follow suit. As a college student, especially, this is the HARDEST thing to teach myself because I love to be wherever my friends are. While college is a time to have fun as a young adult, it's also a time to prepare myself for the future and whatever career path I choose. Even if there's a frat party or my friends want to go out to dinner, that doesn't mean I have to say "yes" every single time. Academics and my own wellbeing should come out on top every single time, so if I don't feel up to it, I need to say "no" to the temptations.
New Year's resolutions seem extremely overrated, in my opinion. Instead, I want to set goals for myself that I can carry out for the rest of my life at any point in time, not just at the start of a new year. Self-renewal can be attainable at any time, and it's about time for me to work on finding myself and what I seek to gain out of my experiences.
