What if every school in the Atlantic Coast Conference replaced their mascot with a beverage that most epitomizes their school?
Let's be honest: that Blue Devil is a little creepy anyway.
Boston College – Vodka Cranberry
Even the bros at BC drink more than just beer. Maybe. Not only does a vodka cran match their questionable maroon and gold color scheme, but Massachusetts is the Cranberry State. Which is not technically true, it’s the Bay State. But they do have a lot of those bogs.
Clemson – Southern Comfort
While some schools may be further down the coast geographically, no other school in the ACC embodies the southern spirit quite like the Tigers of Clemson, South Carolina. Southern charm, southern belles, Southern Comfort.
Duke – Anything Ending In "-tini"
Duke is consistently ranked as one of the snobbiest colleges in the country, and it doesn't get much more snobby than ordering an Appletini at a college bar where all of the drinks are served in plastic cups and there are no martini glasses in sight. Just order a Jack and Coke and move on.
Florida State – Champagne
Lately the Seminoles have had plenty to celebrate. After winning the BCS National Championship last season, their football team remains the top-ranked team in the country this fall. If things play out as many expect, they’ll be popping even more bottles of bubbly. As long as their quarterback doesn’t have any more cravings for crab legs.
Georgia Tech – Vodka Red Bull
If there’s one thing I know about Georgia Tech, it’s that
those guys like to study. A lot. They have a lot of work to do, which means
that if they do drink, it has to be something that will give them the energy to
stay up and study some more. Vodka Red
Bull takes care of that.
Louisville – Kentucky Gentleman
Louisville is in Kentucky. Kentucky is all about bourbon. This brand of bourbon is cheap enough (about $10 per handle) for college
students to consume in mass.
Miami – Tequila Sunrise
Is there anything better than a tequila sunrise on the
beach? I assume drinking on the beach is all they do in
Coral Gables. And if the students do
anything else, then they’re doing the whole “college in Miami” thing wrong.
University of North Carolina – Juice Box
It’s been reported that some of UNC's athletes can
only read at a third or fourth grade reading level. This only seems appropriate.
NC State – Keystone
Known for engineering and agriculture, we all know the students love
the Keystone camo cans. Because who
doesn’t love drinking from a vessel that matches what you’re already wearing?
Notre Dame – Irish Car Bomb
The Fighting Irish. This one was a little too easy.
Pittsburgh – Boilermaker
A very industrial city calls for an industrial drink. A boilermaker simply consists of a glass of
beer and a shot of whiskey. Not super innovative, but then again neither is choosing a panther as your mascot. We may never know what a Hokie is, but nobody is doubting its originality.
Syracuse – Fireball
It’s cold up there in Syracuse, New York. Like really cold. For the nights when a beer blanket just won’t
cut it, a few shots of Fireball will warm you right up. Plus it has that orange thing going on, and we
all know about SU’s thing for orange.
University of Virginia – Mint Julep
The Wahoos like to keep it classy, and nothing says "southern class" more than a mint julep. It's the go-to beverage for horse races, and with Foxfield being somewhat of a holiday in Charlottesville, this truly fits the bill.
Virginia Tech – Bud Light
The turkey is just not cutting it. Considering the mass quantities of the stuff that is consumed each weekend at Tech, this burr seems fitting.To quote the great Kanye West, "Now I ain't calling them no rednecks, but wow they really do drink a lot of Bud Light."
Wake Forest – White Wine
Wake's best grasp on diversity is serving two different types of beer at parties. While it's not their fault that 60 percent of the student body is caucasian, that is what the latest statistics indicate. "White girls drinking white wine," is another slightly more accurate Kanye line and it sums up Wake Forest fairly accurately.