“A love-hate relationship is an interpersonal relationship involving simultaneous or alternating emotions of love and hate—something particularly common when emotions are intense.”

Ah the love-hate relationship… a feeling some of us are all too familiar with. It’s normal to experience a love-hate relationship with something or someone. So why is it at the end of the day the score is always Love-Hate: 1 and Us: 0.

Now, I’ve experienced love-hate relationships with many things. For example, I love ice cream, but I hate the whole gaining weight part. I love shopping, but hate the spending money part. And most of all I hate that I love that one boy who will never feel the same way.

One of my favorite movies is “10 Things I Hate About You,” a story of two very different people who get set up and hopelessly fall in love. (For those of you who have not seen the movie) In the classroom scene Julia Stiles stands before the class and pours her heart out through a poem, which says…

“I hate the way you talk to me
And the way you cut your hair
I hate the way you drive my car
I hate it when you stare
I hate your big dumb combat boots
And the way you read my mind
I hate you so much that it makes me sick
It even makes me rhyme
I hate the way you're always right
I hate it when you lie
I hate it when you make me laugh
Even worse when you make me cry
I hate the way you're not around
And the fact that you didn't call
But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you
Not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all.”

Why is it that given all the warnings we still allow ourselves to be drawn towards those we know are not good for us?

Do we believe they will be different? That they will change for us? Is it desire of what we cannot have? Or are we just down right stupid?

It’s easy to get caught up in a love-hate relationship. To let the love outweigh the hate, however, we are often fooled and forget that these emotions are actually occurring simultaneously. For everything you love about him, chances are there’s something you hate. Never settle for less than what you deserve.

Boy, I am calling you out. While I could list all the things I hate about you, I’d much rather list the 10 things I love about you.

1. I love the fact you’ve given me the motivation to push myself harder in the gym.
2. I love the fact you’ve given me the chance to do things I’d never image myself doing.
3. I love the fact you’ve given me the chance to meet even greater people who make me laugh all the time.
4. I love the fact you still try to reach out to me, even when you’re the last thing on my mind. It reminds me that I’ve come out stronger than you.
5. I love the fact that you have taught me diving right in is never the way to go and that it’s okay to take things slow.
6. I love the fact you taught me the difference between saying it and meaning it. Because simply saying just isn’t enough.
7. I love the fact you gave me a chance to have the best “heart to hearts” with the girls I plan to have next to me at my wedding someday.
8. I love the fact I now daydream about things I am going to do for myself instead of for you.
9. I love the fact that removing you, removed a lot of hate from my life.
10. And I love the fact that you’ve taught me to love myself first.