We’ve all been in that place. The place where we feel so distant, so far gone, that we can’t come back. The place where we’re sitting behind the wall of God - not wanting to break through it and reach him again. There’s a fear that builds up, there’s a shame, there’s sorrow, there’s hurt, and as soon as you break down that wall what happens? Does God forgive what you've been through, or was your sin too far off the list to forgive?
Running from God doesn’t always look like acting out directly against God out of malice. It can culminate itself in ways like giving time to other things, taking a “night off” from religion, or feeling exhausted from faith. Sometimes we just feel really convicted by God or have something we aren’t ready to face at hand and running to Him rather than away from Him doesn’t seem like something that will help find a solution, but only exacerbate the problem.
It’s tough to admit you’re running from God because it doesn’t even feel like running sometimes but just living a normal life. Often I don’t even feel the distance until I’m going to bed and realize I haven’t read my Bible in a week, or I haven’t really thanked God for anything in a while. It’s a weird thing how intimacy with God can so quickly slip away.
Here’s the thing though. As a Christian, your life isn’t normal. You are called higher. You are called deeper. You are called to live a life of intentionality that can be created in the light of Christ and Christ alone. You know you are part of God’s grand scheme and without you, He can’t bring the nations to His Kingdom. Basically, you have big shoes to fill, and it’s scary. With that, I’d like to recall the story of Jonah.
We’ve all heard the story of Jonah and the whale. In short, Jonah was called by God to bring His truth to the Ninevites – the ancient people of Iraq. The Ninevites were known for being the most brutal of brutal and the most terrible of terrible. They are known for committing some of the greatest atrocities towards others mankind has ever seen.
In other words, Ninevah was not Jonah’s ideal vacation spot. Jonah decided that instead of living out God’s command he was going to go to the South of Spain because the weather was nicer there and there wasn’t certain death hanging over his head. While on the way God sent a storm to rattle the boat Jonah was on.
The sailors, who in this instance identified the power of the one true God, realized Jonah had big things to do. This storm was God calling Him. Because of this, they threw Jonah over the boat, and he was swallowed by a whale that carried him to Ninevah's shores. While in the whale, Jonah prayed this prayer;
““In my distress, I called to the Lord,
and he answered me.
From deep in the realm of the dead I called for help,
and you listened to my cry.
3 You hurled me into the depths,
into the very heart of the seas,
and the currents swirled about me;
all your waves and breakers
swept over me.
4 I said, ‘I have been banished
from your sight;
yet I will look again
toward your holy temple.’
5 The engulfing waters threatened me
the deep surrounded me;
seaweed was wrapped around my head.
6 To the roots of the mountains I sank down;
the earth beneath barred me in forever.
But you, Lord my God,
brought my life up from the pit.
7 “When my life was ebbing away,
I remembered you, Lord,
and my prayer rose to you,
to your holy temple.
8 “Those who cling to worthless idols
turn away from God’s love for them.
9 But I, with shouts of grateful praise,
will sacrifice to you.
What I have vowed I will make good.
I will say, ‘Salvation comes from the Lord.’”
Jonah literally called out to God from the belly of a whale on his way to take on one of the most vicious societies known to man thanking Him, and because of his faithfulness, Jonah brought upon one of the largest revivals to have ever been recorded because God acted on His word.
There is nothing you can do to ever escape the sight, love, and forgiveness of God. There’s no shadow He won’t light up and no mountain He won’t climb up. You can never run too far to not run back into the Father’s arms. You may be in a season where you are in the belly of the whale, or you may just be thinking about running.
You may even be shining in God’s loving embrace, but if faith is an anchor as it’s indicated in Hebrews 6, that still means we can drift and come back.
If you have drifted, don’t fret or fear. God still loves you and wants you back always. We are sheep who need a shepherd who knows the way, and God wants to keep every wandering sheep with the herd.
It can be scary to run back to God, give up what has been keeping us away, or make commitments to God we feel we can’t fulfill, but the rest and peace of God are beyond what we can find elsewhere, and He rewards those who are faithful in tenfold.