I know it sounds a bit harsh, but I honestly did not enjoy living in Boca Raton, Florida. The only thing that keeps me going back is my close, tight-knit group of friends who act as the diamond in the rough of that place. So for those who may be considering moving there, or who live there already and currently want to kill me for insulting your home; I ask you to please hear me out before grabbing your torches and pitchforks. These are my reasons for never wanting to move back to Boca Raton:
1. Weather:
The first reason doesn't so much apply to Boca Raton, as is does Florida in general. The weather here is completely unbearable. We pretty much only have two seasons; the "moderately livable" season, and the "HOLY SHIT I'M MELTING! SOMEONE CALL AN AMBULANCE BECAUSE I AM LEGITAMITLY ON FIRE RIGHT NOW!" season. During the "moderately livable" season is when winter takes place. Our winter usually consists of one to three weeks of nice, sixty-five-degree weather. After that one to three weeks, however, it will immediately spike back to seventy-five at the lowest (normally closer to somewhere in the eighties).
There's also the matter of rain. When it rains in Boca (or really anywhere in Florida), it sometimes feels like God is just high as off his ass. There could be something close to a monsoon outside my house, while my best friend who lives right across the street has sunny shine and blue skies. Hell, I've had days where it's storming in front of my house, and perfectly clear behind it. There are times when I'm driving on the highway, and pass under a single cloud that is pouring out rain like bullets. The storm will last for all of five minutes, before clearing up and being sunny again. I'd rather live somewhere that isn't so bi-polar.
2. People:
By this, I'm not referring to all people in Boca. There are some who are very decent and kind (like the friends I mentioned earlier). What I mean by this is there are certain kinds of people in Boca that I would like to avoid most of the time. These types of people don't, necessarily, only exist in Boca, but I certainly ran into them a lot while I was there. For example:
Boca Bitches:
These normally consist of the people living in the rich communities of Boca Raton. These people think they are better, and more important than everyone else because they have a high enough social class to afford to live in the "Mansions of Boca Raton" as I like to call them. They see themselves as something like the royalty of Boca and demand to be treated as such.
You have no idea how offal it is to deal with these people when in certain lines of work, namely in restaurants or summer camps. I worked at a Dunkin' Donuts for two years, and (aside from the customers who came in on a regular basis) I really couldn't stand anyone who walked through our door. They were all so entitled, and if you put even a grain more sugar than they liked they would complain and have you remake it.
As for the summer camps, there were two years (not in a row) when I volunteered. First off, parents sometimes didn't even seem to care about their kids. They walked in the door with their phone up to their ear blabbing on about who knows what (and frankly who cares), drop their kids in the classroom, and leave them with no more than a quick "love you" and peck on the cheek (never once taking the phone away from their ear).
The kids were all spoiled rotten brats too. They would climb all over me, the other volunteers, the teachers, each other, the tables, the desks, the chairs, anything they could possibly climb on they would. They would run around, scream like banshees, steal each other's snacks, push each other, hit each other, and no matter how many times who warned them to stop or put them in timeout for it, they would continue. Then when they go home and complain to their parents about being punished, suddenly the volunteers and teachers are the bad guys for putting their precious baby in the corner. It's like, "I'm sorry your child it's a spoiled brat madam. Maybe if you taught him that kicking other little boys in the nuts was a bad thing this wouldn't have happened." I swear, if my kids ever end up like that I will beat them until they see black and blue.
Old People:
Yes, I know, this section is going to make me sound like a horrible human-being. You know what, I don't care. There is a specific reason for this, and I will get my point across. Now, old people are not all bad people. Most of them are very sweet, and sometimes it's actually really nice to talk to them, and hear their stories. I do not hate old people, in fact, I very much appreciate them and their wisdom. However, Boca Raton is basically where old, Jewish, New Yorkers go to die. Seriously, it is filled with them. Under most circumstances this is fine, but some of them just really make me think there should be a law passed stating that people over a particular age shouldn't be allowed to drive. At the very least, there should be a law demanding people to retake the driver's test every decade or so. I really can't stand being stuck behind anyone if they are going twenty miles under the speed limit (something that has legitimately happened to me). There's also cases where they just don't know how newer car models work. An old acquaintance of mine once got in a really bad accident because some old lady suddenly stopped in the dead center of an intersection while making a left turn. My acquaintance got badly injured, and the lady got off scot-free because she had "thought there was something wrong with her car," so it was deemed an accident. Of course, old people aren't the only once in Boca that needs to get off the road. There's also the other half of the population.
Obnoxious College Students:
Of course, I would fall under one of the categories that I hate about Boca Raton. I am not without faults. Now, I didn't often interact with other college students while in Boca. I more often than not stuck to myself, or with my close group of friends. On the road, however, they are impossible to avoid. They have the opposite problem of the dying, Jewish, New Yorkers; that is to say, they speed down the roads like nobody's business. They swerve between cars, passing everyone they can, and just drive in a generally reckless manner. As you can figure, this causes problems when paired with the old people who are going below the speed limit. There are a lot of accidents that occur, especially on Glades Road near the Florida Atlantic University campus. As I said, I admittedly fall under this category. I do sometimes speed for the hell of it, and get very impatient when caught in traffic. I am part of the problem.
On top of reckless drivers, there's also the "annoyingly flashy" drivers. These are normally the grown children of the older Boca Bitches. These people are often the ones who practically drive race cars for no reason. They have their windows down, blasting music so loud that it makes their cars (and sometimes the cars next to them) vibrate. They rev their engines at red lights like they are trying to challenge the beat up old 2001 Honda Accord with dents and peeling paint (me) to a drag race across town. I can't stand them, and sometimes have internal thoughts of them speeding their way straight into the back of a cop car in hopes that they would either die in the crash, or get arrested.
3. Boring:
There is nothing to do in Boca Raton. There are movie theaters (which are only good if there are actually good movies out), and a tiny mall where the only place you can ever hope to afford anything is the clearance section at Sears. There are places AROUND Boca. Downtown Delray is nice if you stay on Atlantic Avenue, and the Wellington and Sawgrass malls are pretty okay. However, within Boca Raton itself, there's only Mizner Park; which is nice if you're okay with spending all of your money in one night. This brings me to my final point…
4. Expensive:
There is a reason why Boca Bitches exist. Everything in Boca Raton is overpriced to the point where you'd think you're in Disney World or Universal Studios. If you're planning a night out you better plan on spending at least forty bucks if you actually want to enjoy yourself. If you like flashing money around like nobody's business, then, by all means, move to Boca and join the army of rich bastards. As for me, I'm not made of money, I get bored easily, I hate the heat, and quite frankly I hate people too. I spent fourteen years in hell, and somehow survived to tell the tale. I will not be testing my luck again.
