Personalities can vary from person to person, and once we are old enough, we try to understand our feelings and personalities. According to one such personality test, the Myers Briggs test.
This test incorporates the possible personalities of judgment, perception, sensing, intuition, thinking, feeling, extraversion, and introversion. The outcomes are 16 possible personality types. (Disclaimer, although no personality test is definitely or valid by science, this is a common personality test used by Universities.)
I am what is called an INFP. (Introversion, intuition, feeling, and perception.) INFP’s are very idealistic people who are patient, creative, and emotional. We tend to like being by ourselves and just want everyone to get along.
It wasn’t until taking this test and looking into what makes an INFP that I understood why I have been so careful about my words and crying out of nowhere. However, not all people understand personality types or how to deal with a friend who might be this way. There are many phrases that can upset INFP’s such as…
1. “You’re too sensitive.”
As an INFP, we are in-tuned to our emotions and the emotions of others around us. We can be strongly persuaded by thoughts or verbal messages of cruelty, bullying, and other negative motives. Instead of sharing our feelings with others and talking to someone about it, we are introverted and prefer to keep our emotions hidden away and deal with them in our own terms.
Don’t be surprised if we cry out of anger or frustration because that is naturally the coping mechanism that we are first drawn to. Instead of pointing out or emotional state, try to give the INFP some time and space to figure things out. They will come to you when the time is right.
2. “Grow up.”
As we get older, everyone deals and realizes the harsh realities of the world around us. The violence, hatred, segregation of many types of people, are just some of the injustices we see and hear about every day. INFP’s have a sense of child-like imagination spurring inside of them. They like to see the good in others and everyone around them.
Because of this, people may not correlate INFP’s to understanding real-world issues or believe that they are being “too naïve” about the circumstances surrounding us. But clearly, this isn’t true since INFP’s have a strong sense of morality as well. We know “right from wrong” and “truth and deceit.” We try to stay as true to ourselves as much as we can, but just because we choose to see the bright side of things, doesn’t make us childish.
3. “You take everything too seriously.”
Part of being a feeling oriented individual, INFP’s can take anything someone says personally, whether it's good or bad. From a critical standpoint, it's true that we aren’t the best at taking it. This is because we are the “what if” person. We constantly overthink every comment that comes our way and we think a mile a minute into understanding what someone could have meant.
We don’t mean for this to happen, but part of us can’t help but consider every aspect of a statement, and therefore, tend to take things more serious than it should be.