As a single guy I am always looking for good pick up lines. So this week I decided to make a compilation of the absolute worst pick-up lines and stories my female friends have shared with me. If you use any of these, I am so sorry to burst your bubble. Also, on a side note, watch what you type because screenshots are forever.
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1. Let Me Slide This Exotic Novel Into Your DMs Quick
I don't really know what to say about this but definitely shows effort and creativity
2.Eggplant?
The other extreme opposite number 1. He could be asking you to come over and share some baked eggplant with you, but I doubt it.
3. Free Spirit
"we were at the pool a few summers ago and my friend has a free spirit tattoo on her side, he referred to her as a free spirit and then asked her, 'how free are you tonight?'"
This one is pretty creative but apparently ineffective.
4.Are You A Baker?
"Are you a baker? Because your buns are hot?"
I personally hate referring to butt cheeks as buns. I just think it sounds quirky and makes me think of SpongeBob for some reason.
5. So Direct
"DTF?"
This one is straight to the point. I respect that but definitely a swing and miss 99 times out of 100.
6.Teddy
"Hey I lost my teddy bear, can I sleep with you instead?"
I'm just spitballing here, but I am assuming the fact that you just acknowledged that you still sleep with a teddy bear is unattractive to most women.
7. Haaaaaave You Met Ted?
As a wingman, you walk up to random groups of girls and push your buddy in the group and say "Have you met ______"
I used this one the other night to be honest. It really doesn't work. Its a whole lot of really awkward small talk followed by a casual "I think we are gonna leave". Still extremely entertaining.
8. The Greeks Were Lovers
"When I was in Greece last summer on tinder guys pick up lines would be 'Want to Sex?' lol"
I think would of been more effective to use their native tongue. Greek is a beautiful language.
9.The Puzzle
"Hey, I'm terrible at puzzles. Can you help me out? (___)-___-____"
I bet the solution was (sry)-but-nope
10. My Personal Favorite
"When I was born I was given two choices, a big D*** or a good memory. Unfortunately, I can't remember which one I picked."
Apparently being modest wasn't a choice either.
My advice? Be creative and come up with something unique but maybe not sexually related. Flirting is all about trial and error. Finding what works and what doesn't is a process. Fortunately for you, I helped show you what not to say and do. Save you some really awkward moments at the bar. You owe me a whiskey coke.
