There are many things that mark the years of your life, especially as you grow into a young adult. At thirteen, you can proudly claim that you are "an official teenager." At sixteen, you gain the freedom of driving a car and doing what you want with your time. At eighteen, you are officially an adult that can vote, buy lottery tickets...and get a tattoo.
The list of things that are granted with age extends much farther, but this is where I am in my life. I am nineteen years old and, on my eighteenth birthday, I got a tattoo.
Let me preface by saying that this was not a spur-of-the-moment decision. My mom and I discussed the decision for a full year and visited the artist a month prior to my eighteenth birthday to discuss designs and, ultimately, pay the deposit.
Let me also preface by saying that this was my own decision. Nobody pressured me into wanting a tattoo, nobody told me that I "just had to get one," and nobody told me that it should mean anything specific. The idea was entirely my own, an idea that means quite a lot to me.
So here is where I begin my main argument: stop criticizing people, especially young women, for having a tattoo. You don't know what that tattoo could mean to someone. Not all tattoos are drunken expressions of stupidity. Yes, some of them are exactly that but what about that justifies you in criticizing a person for that? For one, they may feel just as embarrassed by it without you pointing it out, so what does anyone gain by this criticism? If anything, the tattoo-bearer gains a further sense of shame.
For another, it is not your body. You do not have a say in what is made of their body unless they are legally under your care (which was the case in my situation, still living under my parents' roof does make me subject to their rules in our household.).
Finally, what do you gain from degrading something that may mean the world to another person? That tiny dolphin could symbolize the life of a loved one, that giant bald eagle could represent a time of service to the country. That small sunshine, centered around a heart, emblazoned on the inner wrist can symbolize a bond that has brought a person out of the darkness of hopelessness into the bright light of optimism.
I know it is not my style to be this outright about things but I am tired of feeling "judged" for my decision to commemorate a lifetime bond with my mother through a tattoo.
"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are gray."
The sunshine that I sport on my wrist symbolizes the relationship that my mother and I have as well as all of the wonderful things she has done for me in my 19 years of life. She has helped me through a lot of personal battles, reminded me that there's always a light at the end of the tunnel, and, no matter what anybody else thinks of me, I will always be her sunshine.
Hearing "You Are My Sunshine" throughout my childhood is a memory that I will always be fond of because it represents a time in my life that I was happiest. It represents a time in my life that I could just be myself, not afraid of what anybody else thought. After all, as long as I am my mom's sunshine, what else could possibly matter?
As I got older, this frame of mind was harder to come by. Days came and went in which I felt the pressure to look, act, and feel a certain way. If I ever strayed from this norm, I began to feel inadequate. I began to feel like I just wasn't good enough and there was simply nothing I could do about it.
But even on those days, I went to my mom. I told her what was bothering me and she would give me advice. Really great advice, I might add.
In a way, my mom became my sunshine too. She has always "made me happy when skies are gray." and I wanted a visual reminder of this when I moved away to college. This is the reason I decided to get a tattoo.
So feel free to judge me on the fact that I have permanently marked my skin in this manner. I will respect your right to your opinion but I ask that, in return, you respect my decision to honor my mother and all that she has done, and continues to do, for me through this tattoo.
Go ahead and ask me about it, I don't mind discussing it at all! All I ask is for you to keep any negative comments to yourself.
And, "please don't take my sunshine away" by seeing it as something that makes me anything different from what I have always been, a friend, a student, a daughter.
I am still me, just with a little more ink.