Six years' time is very long
It's long enough to experience more of life yet
Six years' time was very hard
Experience life, I did, but I couldn't help but think:
The time I graduated college, how you were supposed to be there
The time I saw different friends come and go, that you would always be there
Even the time I took that risk of changing my angle on life, how you would be there to give me encouragement
How our almost mirrored dreams would be accomplished together…..
Yes, six years' time is, in fact, long
But without you, it was harder
I think the realization hit every time I walked into the store to buy flowers
The average occasion would fall under the assumption that the flowers would be given to someone that was expecting to see you
You were expecting to see me
But, not in your tangible body
But with your soul
Your soul waited for my visits, and that was the thing that made me realize:
She's gone, and that was it
So, the garden of other souls who waited for their visitors became our time together
Our middle ground among those with their tangible bodies
But you waited and even during your time here, you were ever so patient even when I was not
There were six years-worth of sadness and bittersweet memories of our smiles and laughs
Of that last message, promising to meet up again
I wonder how our laughs would've sounded had we met up again….
But in six years, that goal we had, although mine tailored a bit with time, has become clearer
It has begun to make sense, and the many doubts I ever had begun to fade away
But please understand: the sixth year was one of the hardest
The sixth year was also one of the most complex
And I can hear your words, pushing me more into my dreams
I can hear you saying, 'I know you can do it! We got this.'
As I walk into my unknown future looking back at six years' worth of life without you,
I can still feel your tug on my sleeve, telling me, 'You still got a lot of work to do girl!'
Laughing along the way
Happy birthday, Olivia. I'll live life like you're right beside me.
