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Politics and Activism

My Sister's Two Week Plan

Tips on how to get your life together.

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My Sister's Two Week Plan
NetDoctor

Sometimes life can get a little (or a lot) crazy and hectic, and everything is kind of falling apart. To be up front about it, your life is a complete mess. You don't really know what to do anymore or how you could fix it, because what is the point in doing anything when your life is in shambles? But wait, have no fear. My sister has devised a completely fool-proof plan of action to get your life together. So, as long as you follow these steps, in just two weeks you will have everything straightened out again.


Step 1. Fully accept the fact that your life is a mess and you need to fix it as soon as possible.

Step 2. Choose a start date for your two week plan.

Step 3. Completely procrastinate week 1 and pretend the plan hasn't started yet.

Step 4. Realize that you now have one week to cram everything in and begin immediately.

Step 5. Clean up your mess of a room so that your life can follow in its footsteps.

Step 6. Reward yourself for this hard work and take a nap.

Step 7. Brush your hair.

Step 8. Actually get dressed in something that you haven’t slept in for the past three nights to make other people think you have everything together.

Step 9. Reorganize all the little things that don’t matter, such as the shelf of dusty books that you haven’t touched in months (which was probably the last time you reorganized it).

Step 10. Get control of your money by creating a budget on what you can spend.

Step 11. Forget about your budget, and go to the mall to shop and get your nails done with your friends.

Step 12. Stop binge watching Netflix on the couch every night until 3 a.m.

Step 13. Go get ice cream because it very well might be the only thing to make you feel better for the moment.

Step 14. Cry.

Step 15. Make a new and improved two week plan that will actually work, and start that one tomorrow.


So maybe it isn’t quite the best way to get your life put back together, and maybe it isn’t as fool-proof as I made it seem, but at least it’s a start. Don’t worry though, no matter how long it might take or how many times you have to go through a “two week plan," you can always get your life turned back around if you put your mind to it and get a little help from your mom.

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