Dear My First Love,

You will never know how truly sorry I am for breaking your heart. You were the first boy to ever really loved me, you loved me before I even loved myself and I think that was the problem all along. You were ready for forever and I couldn't understand how you could spend all of your time with me. But you did and I know you truly loved me and only wanted the best for me. So I would like to say a few things I didn't get to say before I left that night.

I'm sorry I couldn't be the girl you needed, and even if you don't see it I left to protect you. I am sorry I spent some nights on my phone ignoring you. I am sorry for always tickling you. I am sorry this didn't work out, but I will always love you and want the best for you. I am sorry I had to say this in a letter and couldn't say this to you. But I am mostly sorry you had to suffer for so long before I finally spoke up and admitted we were through.

Thank you for being my best friend and the most loyal secret keeper of them all. Thank you for forcing me to try new things. Thank you for teaching me you can have fun without being drunk. Thank you for being sensitive to my anxieties and always reassuring me when I needed it. Thank you for keeping a blanket in the car because I am constantly cold. Thank you for showing me those boys I thought "loved" me just wanted my body. Thank you for always holding my hand when I was scared. Thank you for trying so hard to fix things the moment you realized they were so broken. Thank you for never pressuring me. Thank you for showing me love is protecting someone at all costs. Thank you for letting yourself be miserable so I could be happy and grow. Thank you for the best year of my life. And finally, thank you for being the best first love a girl could ever hope for.

I hope you get everything you hoped for. I hope you become the person I know you are capable for being. I hope you finally watch Game Of Thrones and get what the hype was all about. I hope you get over your first love to meet your great love, even though no one will ever be deserving of all the love you have to give. But mostly I hope you never forget me.

Yours always xo.