“Opposites attract,, ” they all say. Well, I never thought that would be a good or successful thing for me until just this past year. Within the first week of getting to know Chelsie, one thing I knew was similar about us. We both love food and Star Wars. And that made me think, “I love you already”. But, as I got to know Chelsie, other than our nerdy/food loving parts, I learned that we aren’t exactly similar in many other hilarious ways.
1. Athletic vs. Non-Athletic
Ben: When Chelsie began to tell me about herself, I was amazed at some of the things she knew, like every scene of Lord of The Rings, thousands of Star Wars quotes, and even wild exotic foods that she has on her bucket list. It was exciting for because I enjoyed all these unique topics a lot. However, when I would start talking about sports…well, she would get nervous and not really know what to say. Then, one day she broke the news, she knew nothing related to sports. I, on the other hand, love sports and do anything to get a day full of recreational athletics. So, yes, it is odd telling my girlfriend I’m going to go play ultimate frisbee in the quad while she responds with, “I think I’ll sit by this fireplace, drink coffee and read articles”. Nevertheless, we’re both happy and it is a great balance because occasionally I need rest and she needs an action packed day.
Chelsie: I never pictured myself with someone athletic. Not by choice, but because I figured anyone with an ounce of athleticism wouldn’t be able to handle my leisurely walking pace or my lack of enthusiasm about most things sports related. So when Ben looked my way, I was a little confused. I mean, he watches all the sports, he plays all the sports, he loves all the sports. When we’re at school he is constantly doing something athletic and I’m over here reading a book or watching some Netflix. He used to try to include me in the sports, but he has since quit asking… And that’s ok.
2. Young Soul vs. Old Soul
Ben: I love fist pumping, being ridiculous and crazy, and playing fast paced activities like soccer or hockey. Just a few things, but they sum up the atmosphere: young hearted and intense. Now, dating Chelsie has introduced me to a 23-year-old woman holding hostage an old lady’s mind. It is quite hysterical, honestly. When I see her jamming to 1940s music pointing her fingers, knitting on a ‘free fun night’ and getting to bed by 9:30 p.m., I just have to laugh. It always gives me a good chuckle just about every day when I see her sipping coffee just like my grandparents do, or saying things like, “Bing Crosby’s voice is like butta”. Yes, it is odd and not typical for a 23-year-old, but it sure does spice up my life…but the mild spice for old people.
Chelsie: As a self-proclaimed 90-year-old, I enjoy the vintage things in life. I’m an avid knitter, I love listening to the Rat Pack and Doris Day and to be really honest, I could probably go to bed around 9 o'clock every night. It’s my ideal way of life. I don't know how I managed to pick the youngest souled guy possible, but I did. He is a ball of energy and it is the actual greatest. I thought I would enjoy finding someone who would just sit and read with me, but actually, I love that Ben makes me get out of my comfort zone and do things that are characteristic of my age group. We’ve been to concerts and theme parks and we’ve spent hours laughing about the stupidest things possible. On a more serious note, he gives me a reason to stop taking everything so seriously and to just let go and have fun making memories. He makes me feel 23 again (which is my actual age, btw.)
3. Extroverted vs. Introverted
Ben: So, I talk a lot. I love talking to anyone and everyone. However, here lies my problem. Sometimes, it seems like I can’t stop talking. And when I am alone, I have to talk/think to myself constantly because of my over-extrovertedness. This is troublesome when I need sleep or when I could really use some relaxation. Ba-da-da-daaa! (You know, the superhero swooping in sound?) Chelsie to the rescue! Luckily enough, I am dating an introvert and she saves that poor soul who I have been talking to for an hour. Also, she is good at showing me new ways to relax. For example, since we’ve been dating, instead of being with people 100% of the time when I am free, I’ve been balancing it out with watching an episode of The Office alone, or sitting outside and listening to only the nature for a while. Whether it be telling me that I interrupted her or helping me just calm down and listen, my introvert girlfriend really gives me another perspective on life!
Chelsie: People are awful. Ok, not really. But as a pretty extreme introvert, sometimes it can feel this way. Sometimes, I truly believe that I could be a mountain hermit who lives off the land and only goes into town before winter hits to grab supplies. I love who I am and I love my alone time, but I will admit that there are days when I need to go out and experience some human interaction. This is where my loving boyfriend comes in. I have never met a person who genuinely loves people more than him. He is constantly looking for people. When we were in Florida, we held up the line at the Disney store so he could ask the cashier where she was going to school, what she was majoring in, how long she had worked there, if she liked it, etc. If you ever talk to Ben, you can be rest assured that he will know your life story by the end of your conversation. He makes me come out of my shell and enjoy the company of other people. He has shown me the importance of a small, but meaningful conversation, and that the opportunity to gain new friends is always available.
Although one may think it would be hard making compromises on some occasions due to our differences, being opposites is overall exciting and adventurous. Day in and day out, Chelsie and I get to show each other new ways to enjoy life.