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New Year

2018, Goodbye And Good Riddance

This not the end of me, this is the beginning.

Marina Khalil

Jan 09, 2019

The Narrative

Wikimedia Commons

Dear 2018,

You really tested me.

You brought me up and down more than any roller-coaster ride could attest for.

You moved me around about six or seven times as I can somehow just thrive without stability. You played me your hand of cards, and they were the opposite of steady, happy, and hopeful. For that, you scared me more than anyone or anything ever possibly could have, and trust me, no one will replace you for that one.

You repeated my past then laughed at my face about it. My recurring nightmares became real once more, just for you to make sure I was ready to accept it and move on from my trauma. You mocked me in such a way, and I have no respect for you.

You took one of the most important people to my family and me, and I will never forgive you for that. Broken hope and broken promises seemed to be your motto. Let me know how far you get in life with that outlook.

You put a shiny, beautiful dream in my life, I got so close I can taste it, only for you to rip it away. I'm glad you thought that was funny because I was a little concerned for my future. No big.

You've tested my faith in my career and who I even am. No matter how many times I built myself up, you came knocking on my door just to tear me back down. Never in my life have I encountered something so merciless.

You have, however, blessed me with a beautiful gift, that I can't open until 2019, so guess who will get the credit for that one?

Mark my words.

I know for a fact...

I will not let you destroy me the way I did 2017. You will not get the best of me, and the worst of me has been permanently laid to rest. So guess what — you get none of me.

You tore me down more than any year I've known in my young life, but you will not get away with having the last laugh. You have been victorious over me more than enough, and because of this, you have no idea the warrior you've created, and the one yet to come.

I do not condone your behavior 2018, and I do not forgive you. I will never be able to forget you, but you did NOT WIN.

This not the end of me, this is the beginning.

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2018, Goodbye And Good Riddance

This not the end of me, this is the beginning.

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The struggles of having an RBF are all too real

1. People asking if you're mad at them.

2. Those people who hand out flyers don't always try to stop you.

3. Creepy guys telling you to smile.

4. "I thought you were a bitch when I first met you."

5. People telling you you'd be "so much prettier if you smiled."

6. Doing your makeup and looking great, which somehow intensifies the bitch face.

7. Regularly explaining "it's just my face."

We all go through certain stages when we have a crush, Tina just explains it better.

That moment that someone you never looked twice at suddenly makes you do a double take out of no where.

But you can't have a crush, that's outrageous. It's all in your head.

Because you don't have a crush, there's no reason to tell anyone about anything. Right?

But then they do something irresistible and you start to lose it.

Now accepting the fact you have a crush, you have to keep it under control.

Then there's the part where you tell your friends who will claim they called it.

They'll be excited and cheer you on. That's until they realize that your crush is all you'll be talking about.

Your obsession has become so bad, that your Facebook stalking is getting out of control.

But your friends will try and help move things along any way they can. That doesn't mean it will be any helpful though.

As time goes on, you start having fantasies about the two of you and it's starting to scare you a little.

You can't focus on anything because all your attention is on them and everything they do.

Anybody who comes near your crush is now an enemy, and you are willing to fight for your crush.

When you see them, you act like an idiot. Trying to hide your feelings may not be as discrete as you think.

Keeping your feelings inside will start to be harder and harder until you can't keep it inside anymore.

Who knows, maybe it will work out? Take a chance.

Everybody hurts sometimes.

May the odds be ever in your favor.

What about those of us who don't do it all in four years?

1. You feel like an elder.

2. You may feel lonely.

3. Senioritis is more real than ever.

4. You may feel a little down sometimes.

5. Fear of missing out won't be as real.

6. You are a college pro.

7. You'll have more free time.

8. You're happy you're still in school.

9. You feel like a guru.

10. You continue to grow.

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