The worst is upon us. Armageddon, the end of sanity and the beginning of unstoppable chaos, has descended onto the sleepy paths of a once peaceful life. Those we trust most and that which we hold dear will, and has, unavoidably turned against us. Food, the bringer of life, the crux of humanity, has betrayed our trust. Just a few days ago, during a seemingly calm afternoon, I was poisoned by that which I cherished most. And, through its betrayal, I suffered a most foul and odious consequence: Food Poisoning. I never before thought it possible that food, that the joy of consuming delicious things, could, one day, destroy me so thoroughly. I mean, I always knew it was possible to lose yourself in the pleasure of food (a condition of overindulgence far too common in this day and age), but I never imagined that my simple consumption of college cuisine could cause me such pain.

When I say pain, mind you, I mean honest to goodness suffering. It was an entirely new experience for me. I have, of course, been ill before, but never have I suffered such terrible symptoms. That being said, the extent of my agony could also stem from the fact that it was the first time in all my life that I was secluded away from my home during sickness. It was the middle of the week, after all. I may have felt like death warmed over, but I couldn’t just skip class. So, inevitably, that meant that I was condemned to sit alone, in gloom and pain, waiting for the weekend, waiting for rescue from my prison. And, that relief came none too soon as I could scarce stand another moment locked away in my dorm room waiting to go home. It’s odd, really. I have experienced home-sickness before, but the severity of desire to return home had never been quite so strong. I suppose that is because home is some measure of safety for all young people, and, in my hours (my long and tortuous hours) of suffering, what I longed for most was that comforting touch of familiarity.

Sentiments aside, I am honestly flabbergasted by the fact that I was poisoned by the college. I mean, I realize that it wasn’t a conscious decision on its part, but, really. How much money do I shell out each semester to attend your fancy classes and live in your overpriced dorms? And, you what, you poison me in return? Rude, College, just rude. I can say for a fact that I will probably not be getting over this any time soon. The haunting images of sickness will most definitely loom in my memory every time I walk through the Caf doors. I can hardly wait to return on Monday. Well, I suppose, through my pain, I have gained some perspective. I have learned that if your food tastes weird, smells weird, even looks at you weird, just put it down, walk away, and get out of there. You don’t want to risk it. You have no idea what that stuff is capable of.