My Conversation With Death- How It Has Taught Me To Live | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Student Life

My Conversation With Death — How It Has Taught Me To Live

This is what death has been teaching me.

339
My Conversation With Death — How It Has Taught Me To Live
Madigan Landess

Death can be a sensitive and commonly undiscussed topic. But, why? We all know we are going to die. So, why has it molded such an emotional roadblock for many of us? Perhaps in fear of its abducting hold of our mortality? Or, perhaps because we know nothing other than life? In the midst of the 21st century, where depression and anxiety are sitting at the popular table, I wonder why can't we also talk about death?

In order to break the ice with this topic of conversation, I wanted to introduce my own experience with death — a very uplifting first article, am I right? I have lost three people in my life just over the past two years, and it has been the most painful, yet humbling experience.

Just two months ago my family lost our biggest smile — our just 10-year-old, sweet Sable. I remember I was pulling into my driveway for dinner with my family. My mom saw my car and ran out to meet me as I saw her eyes swell with tears. My sweet cousin Sable had just passed away only hours after she was diagnosed with the common flu. My family crowded in the hospital room later the next evening to say our final goodbyes as we shared many tears, many hugs, and many prayers. I can still feel her little hand in mine as she rests beside her parents in the hospital bed, all cozied up in her pajamas and pink painted fingernails. I can still feel the tears on my cheek and I still feel the heartache for her family and friends. We are all still in shock, still hurting, still grieving.

There is no denying that loss is one of the most painful heartaches imaginable. But, I choose to believe there is much to be learned from death as there is from life, and I am still learning. c:

Love without reservation.

Our days are not promised. One act of kindness can go a long way.

Just days after Sable's passing my family received incomprehensible amounts of love from the community. Community members decorated the area with the pink ribbon (Sable's favorite color), supported her Go Fund Me more than what my family ever imagined, and so much more. Indeed, I learned the pain of loss through her passing, but I am also learning love. A love so selfless and pure, that has transformed my prior understanding of love into something more — a love that lifts the heart by also lifting up others — a love that shines like Sable. How spectacular to see that a little girl can make such a big impact on her community within such little time. At only 10-years-old, her swelling generosity has inspired many and continues to deepen my pursuit toward other's hearts as well.

My scars are armor.

Do not be ashamed of your scars. Use the pain, the tears, the heartache and take it to battle. It is what makes you dangerously beautiful — you are stronger because of them. It can, at times, be difficult to find the wisdom that comes from pain, but every scar is a mark of where your structure was mended. Share your wisdom through your scars, and let it be your greatest weapon.

My faith is stronger than my grief.

I used to have a hard time not being angry with God and wonder why he would allow such a tragedy to consume my family. I do not believe that God necessarily plans for the bad things to happen, but I do believe he knows they are coming. He may not brace us for it, but I love how when the pain does come he can take it and transform it into something beautiful... and that's where faith comes in.

Even though at times I am lost in confusion and question 'why God?' I choose to let His truth be my compass. That choice to rest in His comfort and to surrender my fear brings a peace that suddenly outweighs the doubt. That's faith— that choice to trust that God is good even when my situation isn't. It does not make the heartache any less painful, but the choice of faith does shift perspective. It is a choice that took me some time to make, but by continuing to choose God over and over I now trust that through the pain, he is making me new.

Grow through it to go through it.

It is okay to grieve, do not detach yourself from it.

Death buries a hole that I believe can never be filled. Sadness may evolve to treasured memories and anger to comfort, but the hole never truly goes away. "Going through" these emotions of grief is what I think also teaches you to grow from it. The transformation may be painful, and a process that takes a great depth of time, but I cannot wait to meet the girl on the other side who has "grown through" all of her heartache.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Featured

15 Mind-Bending Riddles

Hopefully they will make you laugh.

189410
 Ilistrated image of the planet and images of questions
StableDiffusion

I've been super busy lately with school work, studying, etc. Besides the fact that I do nothing but AP chemistry and AP economics, I constantly think of stupid questions that are almost impossible to answer. So, maybe you could answer them for me, and if not then we can both wonder what the answers to these 15 questions could be.

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

Most Epic Aurora Borealis Photos: October 2024

As if May wasn't enough, a truly spectacular Northern Lights show lit up the sky on Oct. 10, 2024

14421
stunning aurora borealis display over a forest of trees and lake
StableDiffusion

From sea to shining sea, the United States was uniquely positioned for an incredible Aurora Borealis display on Thursday, Oct. 10, 2024, going into Friday, Oct. 11.

It was the second time this year after an historic geomagnetic storm in May 2024. Those Northern Lights were visible in Europe and North America, just like this latest rendition.

Keep Reading...Show less
 silhouette of a woman on the beach at sunrise
StableDiffusion

Content warning: This article contains descriptions of suicide/suicidal thoughts.

When you are feeling down, please know that there are many reasons to keep living.

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

Power of Love Letters

I don't think I say it enough...

457477
Illistrated image of a letter with 2 red hearts
StableDiffusion

To My Loving Boyfriend,

  • Thank you for all that you do for me
  • Thank you for working through disagreements with me
  • Thank you for always supporting me
  • I appreciate you more than words can express
  • You have helped me grow and become a better person
  • I can't wait to see where life takes us next
  • I promise to cherish every moment with you
  • Thank you for being my best friend and confidante
  • I love you and everything you do

To start off, here's something I don't say nearly enough: thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart. You do so much for me that I can't even put into words how much I appreciate everything you do - and have done - for me over the course of our relationship so far. While every couple has their fair share of tiffs and disagreements, thank you for getting through all of them with me and making us a better couple at the other end. With any argument, we don't just throw in the towel and say we're done, but we work towards a solution that puts us in a greater place each day. Thank you for always working with me and never giving up on us.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

11 Signs You Grew Up In Hauppauge, NY

Because no one ever really leaves.

26420
Map of Hauppauge, New York
Google

Ah, yes, good old Hauppauge. We are that town in the dead center of Long Island that barely anyone knows how to pronounce unless they're from the town itself or live in a nearby area. Hauppauge is home to people of all kinds. We always have new families joining the community but honestly, the majority of the town is filled with people who never leave (high school alumni) and elders who have raised their kids here. Around the town, there are some just some landmarks and places that only the people of Hauppauge will ever understand the importance or even the annoyance of.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments