Since fifth grade, we have been best friends. We have gone through the good, the bad, and the ugly together.
Out of our 14 years of friendship, we have only gotten into one major fight. And that still didn't matter, because during it she ended up in a huge car accident and I was still by her side. I even got cheated on the night it happened, because I chose her and not the guy I was seeing at the time.
She's my person, and she always will be my person. No guy has ever given me the love that she has given me and that's OK.
When it comes to deciding where to go to college, she picked to stay in our small town, and I picked to move one thousand miles away. I, however, switched schools my second year, and now I am only a seven hour drive away. We both have both since graduated and got our "dream jobs" and our "fairytale relationship." However, something changed about her, in the last year.
We had spent countless hours driving around town, talking about our futures and who we wanted in our weddings. And of course from elementary, to high school, to college, to adulthood your plans change! But the only dynamic that never changed about each other's weddings was that we were going to be each other's maids of honor.
A little bit about my best friend is that she never built close relationships with much of anyone.
They were just friends, but not people you go out with on the weekends, or have sleepovers with, or whatnot. She stuck to focusing on her relationships with her boyfriend and her family and we always hang out any time I came to visit. Her boyfriend would try to push her to make other friendships, but she was so busy with school and other things it never happened, which nothing wrong with that at all!
I was the opposite, though. I could easily bullshit a paper, and I bounced around from relationships, and I loved to go out. I built friendships — not ones that would even compare to the friendship I have with my best friend — and have other people in my life.
Once she graduated from college, however, she met a group of girl friends.
She started spending every second with them, even more than she was with her own boyfriend. It was like she was completely obsessed with these people. I didn't think anything of it until I came home from winter break. I had just downed a pitcher and half of sangria, and we were just talking when she told me the first thing that ever truly broke my heart.
"I'm going to have [NAME] as my Maid of Honor, just because it'll be easier because she lives here, she's really organized, and she has a lot of great ideas already."
I never felt my heart shatter that bad. I had no idea what to say to that. A girl she has known for 4 months, will steal the place of what I was going to be for the last 14 years... And all for what? It's a seven hour drive, and I visit all the time! Plus, it was a dig to say I am not organized... and who is to say I don't have good ideas?
Now, I am lost for words, for what to do. Do I take a dig back, and not have her as mine? Do I state how I feel? There are so many questions going unanswered because I don't speak my mind on how I feel. These girls have ruined my entire friendship of 14 years, within four months. And it sucks.
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