These Events Could Happen And MSU Still Wound't Cancel Class | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Student Life

7 Near-Apocalyptic Events That Could Happen And MSU's Reasoning Not To Cancel Class

SPARTANS WILL go to class.

53
https://unsplash.com/photos/P0aJut-EvLY
Unsplash

In This Article:

On Sunday, January 27th with a forecast for the next day calling for 8 inches of snow and wind chills well below zero degrees, MSU sent out the following email to all staff members and students:

Sara Ursum

As clearly stated, it's more important to MSU that it's students attend class than suffer from frostbite (which can occur in only 10 minutes with the given conditions). Even with the snow storm of the year occurring and the coldest temperatures that the sate of Michigan has seen in years taking place in East Lansing, MSU administration came up with a shocking solution to assure students that they'd be able to make it to class: simply hold your breath until you get inside.

Even when nearly every other university in the state closed for the day, MSU remained open. Which poses the question, how close could the world be to ending before Michigan State finally decides to cancel class? To be honest with you, I think they'd come up with an excuse for just about every situation.

1. The University catches on fire

MSU would likely send out an email reminding us to bring water bottles and a change of clothes in case the flames become too hot and we sweat through our clothes and become dehydrated. Better yet, they may even suggest that we bring marshmallows in order to cook s'mores on our walk through the flames.

2. All technology fails

Via snail mail, MSU would let us all know that classes will still be in session and any papers that we had saved on our computers must now be rewritten by and instead in order to be submitted. Their advice for the major research paper you have due tomorrow? Find a way to get your hands on a hard copy of an encyclopedia.

3. Campus becomes completely underwater

We simply can't graduate in four years if we don't attend class or drop all of our credits! Instead of un-enrolling for the semester, every student is encouraged to take KIN101A: Swimming I. The whole campus becomes our classroom.

4. Zombie apocalypse occurs

MSU's solution is simple: the dress code for the day is a full head to toe look of being wrapped in toilet paper. If they can't tell the difference between you and them, then they'll never attempt to harm us in the first place.

5. An asteroid is hurtling towards Earth

MSU sends out a text alert urging all students to please wear sunscreen and sunglasses for the day. Long exposure to the sun (or any objects from space that are on fire) can cause irreversible damage, after all!

6. Apes conquer the planet

MSU would email every student suggesting that on our walk to class we bring extra bananas with us. If we try to feed the apes, maybe they will become our friends. If all else fails, maybe we can throw them on the road and cause them to slip like in Mario Kart.

7. The eruption of a super volcano

MSU's advice would be to invest in tight, fireproof clothing that will not ignite with the sparks flying around campus. If you encounter a path that is blocked by lava on your walk to class, simply find a new route. They'll suggest that we allow extra travel time as many roads may be too filled with lava to travel.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

10 Things To Know About The First Semester Of College

10 things that most incoming college freshmen have no idea about.

299
campus
Pexels

Starting college is pretty scary and fun at the same time. You are free of your parents(in most cases) but this is the first time you have no idea what the heck is going on. Here are 10 things you may want to know going into your first semester.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

The Daily Struggles of Being a College Commuter

It's not all morning coffees and singing along to the radio.

1064
The Daily Struggles of Being a College Commuter
morethanwheels

I've been in college for four years now. I spent half my time as a commuter and half as a resident so I've experienced both sides of the housing spectrum. One thing I've learned comparing the two is that my struggles as a commuter far outweigh anything I went through while living on campus. Commuters have to deal with the problems school brings along with a slew of other issues; I've filled up my gas tank in the worst kind of weather conditions and napped in random places in public more times than I'm proud to say of. This is a list of some of the most challenging aspects of being a commuter.

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

15 Times Michael Scott's Life Was Worse Than Your Life

Because have you ever had to endure grilling your foot on a George Foreman?

3783
Michael Scott
NBC

Most of the time, the world's (self-proclaimed) greatest boss is just that, the greatest. I mean, come on, he's Michael Freakin' Scott after all! But every once in a while, his life hits a bit of a speed bump. (or he actually hits Meredith...) So if you personally are struggling through a hard time, you know what they say: misery loves company! Here are 15 times Michael Scott's life was worse than your life:

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

12 Midnight NYE: Fun Ideas!

This isn't just for the single Pringles out there either, folks

17888
Friends celebrating the New Years!
StableDiffusion

When the clock strikes twelve midnight on New Year's Eve, do you ever find yourself lost regarding what to do during that big moment? It's a very important moment. It is the first moment of the New Year, doesn't it seem like you should be doing something grand, something meaningful, something spontaneous? Sure, many decide to spend the moment on the lips of another, but what good is that? Take a look at these other suggestions on how to ring in the New Year that are much more spectacular and exciting than a simple little kiss.

Keep Reading...Show less
piano
Digital Trends

I am very serious about the Christmas season. It's one of my favorite things, and I love it all from gift-giving to baking to the decorations, but I especially love Christmas music. Here are 11 songs you should consider adding to your Christmas playlists.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments