You're just like your mom.

Okay, ____ jr.

You're gonna be just like your daddy.

The number of times you hear that growing up rivals the number of times you get told you don't understand because you are young. But hears the thing, you do not have to be your parents, and sometimes yes you do understand.

John Green said, "We are greater than the sum of our parts." Aristotle said something strikingly similar way before, and so have others. We are more than the parts we are made up of. We are greater as a whole, and it's all true.

We are made up of a million pieces, the pieces our parents gave us don't make us who we are.

Our parents give us our genetic makeup, we go around day by day with little pieces of them. Not just from the chromosomes they passed on, but with the color of our eyes or the shade of our skin and hair. Some of us laugh like our fathers and have our mothers tempers. For some people, the qualities they received from their parents make them proud. For others looking in the mirror and seeing the eyes and mouth of a parent makes them want to crawl out of their skin. Some love their humor they "got" from their father or the laugh of their mother. Or maybe you're okay with looking like your mother, but knowing she could have passed her anger through her genes make you fear becoming a mother yourself.

We are more than our parents though. All of those pieces that came from them though are nothing compared to what is yours. All the pieces that are yours specifically. From your own unique genetic makeup to your memories that shape you, and the choices you make every day. Those are the pieces that make you, you.

Every day we get a choice, and you can choose to be more.

Every day we wake up and get a choice. We can choose to be angry at our parents, our friends, or the world around us. We have to choose to more though. If you want to grow up and become a pharmacist just like your dad, awesome and be great at it. If you choose to distance your self from your parents and make a better life for you, do it and know that your mental health comes first. If you love your mother but hate the way she treats others, then love her anyway but know you are not her. If you choose not associate with your parents in any way, that's okay too. You owe them nothing. If your parents aren't in your life and others are, just know they you get all these same choices. Our parents do not define us.

We are more than the sum of our parts, and we are more than the sum of our parents.