- The Atlanta Falcons didn’t lose the Super Bowl. They just succeeded in facilitating the biggest comeback in the event’s history.
- Alcohol found to be 100% healthier than smoking when measuring long-term lung effects.
- Nintendo WiiU more powerful than Xbox 1 and PS4 playing Mario Kart.
- Weather was bright and sunny during President Trump’s acceptance speech compared to hurricane Katrina.
- English majors have the most marketable skills compared to the other Starbucks workers.
- Global Warming declared a hoax because it gets colder from Fall to Winter.
- Straight white men incapable of having privilege because some found to get sad sometimes.
- Binge-watching entire seasons in one night found to be healthy behavior according to Netflix executives.
- Red solo cups rated most useful by ping-pong enthusiasts.
- IPhone 7 and 7s most successful Iphones since previous year.
- Immigrants most likely to commit crimes by foreigners.
- U.S. District Senior Judge James Robart of Seattle makes an outrageous decision when blocking Trump’s travel ban by deliberately doing his job.
- Soda found to be part of a healthy, balanced diet when cheat meals are included.
- Emotional detachment found to be the top way to avoid getting hurt by meaningful relationships.
- The problem currently being faced is consistently rated the most daunting ever.
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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Ashlynn West
1. "Should I skip class today?"
Or "Can I drop out of college yet?" both are usually a daily occurrence.
2. "Did you hear ________ is engaged?"
I swear every time I open up Facebook another person is engaged, married, or pregnant.
3. "When are you coming home?"
Soon, but not soon enough.
4. "I finally talked to the cute guy in my science lecture."
Usually followed by responses like "Ohh what did you say?"
5. GIFs, on GIFs, on GIFs.
Throw a couple of memes in there too.
6. "I saw the cutest puppy on my walk to class this morning!"
Sometimes this even includes a picture of said dog and makes our hearts melt.
7. "Do you remember when we ________ at ________?"
Ahh high school memories, man does time fly.
8. "I miss you."
I miss you too.
See also: 13 Things All College Students Should Always Have On Them
1. Spending their money - when they actually don't have any.
$0.33 in your bank account but Chipotle sounds way too good to pass up right now.
2. Take naps. Lots of naps.
Bad day? Take a nap. Good day? Celebrate with a nap. Bad grade on a test? The answer is obviously to nap.
3. Staying up late binge-watching a Netflix show when you have an early class.
See also:The 16 Virginia Colleges As Characters From 'The Office'
Well, yes I have to be up at 8 but it would obviously be sinful to go to bed without finding out who the killer is.
4. Skip a class to do something completely unnecessary.
Sometimes class is really the last place you want to be, so what if you skip it once to head down to the beach? One day can't do too much harm...personal days are a necessity.
5. Putting all your homework off for the night before it's due just so you can do nothing for a night.
You're slammed all week, so if you have a potential night to do absolutely nothing, that is definitely worth taking. Sure we'll regret it tomorrow, but for the night you're carefree.
6. Going out on a Thursday night when you have a test the next day.
We've all done it, and most likely felt completely terrible in the morning, but at least our Snapchat Story from the night before is a perfect replica of the previous night's activities.
7. Making impulsive decisions.
So you're telling me it is frowned upon to splurge online and spend $74 on clothes in one sitting?
8. Write an important paper in one night.
It seemed like a good and manageable idea at the time, but little did we know we would stay up literally all night - falling in and out of sleep - writing it.
9. Classifying Ramen as your main food group.
Such a perfect and easy meal. Sure, sometimes we'll get completely tired of it, but at least it's always there for us as a go-to when we need it.
10. Going on late night food runs - and I mean really late.
It's 2 am but for some reason you just really can't shake the thought of some late-night fast food. So naturally, you go out and get it, without much of a second thought.
11. Having more than 3 cups of coffee a day.
Because one definitely wasn't enough and you still have three classes ahead of you.
12. Doing really dumb, irresponsible things when out with your friends.
You'll probably regret doing most of them in the morning (or not), but at least it was all seemingly worth it at the time. Those kind of memories are priceless.
13. Finishing an entire show on Netflix in less than a week.
Listen, it's really not as hard as it sounds. There's so many addicting shows out there. And, are you really in college if you haven't done this before?
Madison Morgan
1. Chad from Sigma Why
There is no coincidence I put this as the number one thing to avoid your first year on campus. Nine out of 10 fraternity boys can and will make life messier and harder than it needs to be. Avoid the Brads in this world.
I recommend focusing this year on finding yourself and figuring out your place without adding ignorant sex-crazed boys to the mix. Sure they can be fun to party and spend time with, but if you give them too much of your time you may find yourself in a sticky situation. I promise you will not find your husband at your first fraternity party in college, so focus on yourself and living your best single life without getting involved with a Chad.
2. Accepting questionable solo cups from any male whatsoever
I don't care how hot Chad is, or how cute his friends are. If a boy offers you any open container, either say no thank you or take that cup and put that thing on the floor seconds later. Most college boys are super sketch, and I would only trust your close girls in the get-go. To be safe, stick to beer at parties or simply bring your own drink (unless you're down to wake up next to Chad having no clue what happened the night before).
3. Wasting all your dining dollars within the first two months of school
This one is sad but true. You don't want to be the one kid with zero money left when all your friends are chowing down on La Madeleine and Taco Bell the second month of school. I have too many friends who blew all of their dining dollars in the get-go and have to sit around sad and hungry for the remainder of the semester. Just be smart and frugal, and all will be well!
4. Going to the busiest library when you need to grind out a 15 page paper
At the University of Kentucky, Willy T. is the library of choice by most. It is large and beautiful, but it can be very busy and distracting at times. If you are only going to get one small assignment done and socialize, go for the "fun" library, but if you have to work on 6 hours of anatomy homework and write a 15 page essay, I recommend going to a smaller library on campus. It will be much quieter and 10 times easier to focus and be productive.
5. Skipping class frequently
I'm going to let you in on a secret. Going to every class every single day is, in theory, a great idea, but is it practical all the time? The answer is no. Here is my special recommendation:
1. Attend all your mandatory classes unless you are throwing up everywhere and or actually dying. Having to go to office hours and do a bunch of extra work for not attending out of laziness is big dumb.
2. Skip the less important classes when and if you feel you can. I was able to skip biology most days because our lectures were posted online daily. I also skipped philosophy and linguistics many times for the same reason! Be smart and don't forget exam dates and due dates if you decide to sleep through class for the 15th time.
3. Take your exams on time!!!! It is a hassle to reschedule the exam with your professor, so just take it when you're supposed to. Push through that hangover if needed, you will make it out alive I promise.
6. Avoiding taking the bus. You are never too cool to utilize campus transportation.
First semester I made the mistake of being that person who was "too good" to take the bus. Man was that stupid! Perks of taking the bus include:
1. Getting extra sleep. Wake up late? Hop on the bus and make it just before class starts.
2. Not having to bear scolding heat, blizzards, or monsoons.
3. Enabling the lazy person you are. Eliminate the extra walking you have to do for the day.
7. Stressing over assignment after assignment
My philosophy is stress is a choice when it comes to school. Stress is a natural thing and all of us encounter many stressors on a daily basis, but school is the one thing I believe you CAN control. Make the conscious decision to not allow anything to get to you. If you have a gigantic paper coming up, acknowledge the fact that you are going to have to write it and move on. Get it started and make some progress, and then get on with your life. Letting an assignment dictate your life and happiness is not something I am about, and I am a much happier person now that I accept everything that comes my way and do not allow it to stress me out.
8. Sitting in your dorm when everyone else is out having fun
Freshman year is the time to have fun and say yes as much as possible. Don't be picky about who you spend your time with, just try to experience as many things as possible. Do not limit yourself to the same three people. Expand your group and be as inclusive as possible! If some girls on your hall are going to lunch and invite you, go! If your guy friend from Communications class wants to study with you at the library, go for it! If your sorority sisters want Waffle House at 2 a.m. on a random Wednesday night, join them. Experience. Experience. Experience.
9. Staying in your comfort zone
You are not the same person you were in high school. Think of coming to college as a rebirth and a completely new beginning. If you were super shy in high school, but want to be more outgoing and social in college, do it and don't feel nervous about it. Nobody knows who you were in the past, so work toward creating the version of yourself you aim to become and roll with it
10. Being a douche to everyone
If you want people to like you, the only piece of advice I have is to not be mean to others. Sounds silly, but the people I like least in college are the ones who think they are too good to be nice to others and treat everyone with respect. Please include others and do not allow anyone to feel like an outsider (unless they're a douche bag and rude, let them be alone). If you can be a decent human and nice to everyone, I promise you will make so many friends and truly love your college experience.
Polish Magazine
1. "I'm Tired."
Regardless of what time your class is during the day, you definitely have thought about how much you'd rather be in your bed taking a nap than dozing off in class.
2. "How many absences do I have left?"
Six absences and you fail the course? Better schedule in those five for when you really need it. Can I say early Spring Break?
3. "Did we have any homework?"
Why is everyone reaching into their backpacks to get papers? Oh I totally forgot about that five page paper that was due today.
4. "Why is it so cold in here?"
Are they trying to make me freeze?
5. "I'm hungry."
What are those dying whale noises coming from my stomach? What I would do for a burger right now.
6. "What grade do I need to make on the final to get an A?"
I need to make a 96 on the final to get an A in the course? Better just give up now,
7. "What time is it?"
Asking what time it is really means how many more minutes until freedom.
8. "I want Starbucks."
That Venti Caramel Macchiato I skipped this morning because I was late would be so good right now.
9. "How is this going to help me in the future?"
How is learning about the Pythagorean Theorem going to help me calculate my taxes and be an actual adult in the future?
10. "Will anyone notice if I leave early?"
Maybe I'll go get some food before the lunch rush begins.
11. "I really need to go to the bathroom."
Nothing's worse than when you have to go but can't because the professor just started lecturing on the monohalogenation of alpha carbons and you can't afford to miss that.
12. "This class is so boring."
Why did I sign up for this class in the first place? Oh, because it's a class required to graduate.
13. "I can't wait to take a nap after this."
After a long day of classes, nothing sounds better than crawling back into bed and taking a well-deserved 3 hour nap.
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