Nowadays we're all just looking for love,
we've found self-love, but some people still seem to be having a hard time figuring out exactly what they want. It may be that we have such a simplified way of understanding what love really is, or maybe we have too many stigmas against what love can be. It is the status quo to be in a monogamous relationship, primarily because we're selfish and really would rather not share our significant other with another person. It may also be due to the fact that we haven't allowed ourselves to explore the different possibilities of what a relationship should mean to us. With family values, social media and our friends two cents, its hard to make room for what you want in a relationship and ultimately, what you NEED!
Now hold on...I am NO love doctor.
but I can tell you that if being in a one on one relationship has no excitement for your love life then maybe you should try something else! This is not to pardon those of you who are simply inconsiderate assholes, you know who you are. This is simply an answer to the cries of those of you who have the emotional capacity to love more than one person. YES, YOU CAN LOVE MORE THAN ONE PERSON AT THE SAME TIME! There is no need to question the capability of the heart to be compassionate for more than one person. Sometimes we connect with different people in different ways and this can lead to a deeper more intense passion for everyone involved!
Two's cool, but Three makes a damn good team
Three or more if you can handle it! I'm not one to put labels on what other people choose to do with their lives, but many would refer to this type of relationship as "Open" or in some cultures, it can be identified as polygamy. Either way, if you can connect with other people who are open to sharing that kind of energy with you, why settle for anything less? It is MAJOR KEY that everyone involved understands that no one person is more important than the other. There should be equal and unconditional love for each partner and it should be clear to everyone the circumstances of the relationship!
Now I'm not saying...
don't try to force your significant other to be open to something that they're not ready for. Not everyone is comfortable loving more than one person in such an intimate way and that's ok! If this IS something that you are personally ready for then communicate that to your partner in a way that doesn't make them feel like they aren't enough for you already. Just make it clear to them that you are happy (if you are), but that you recognize that you can be more open with your love and compassion with others. NEVER, EVER, EVER make your partner feel like you want someone else or like you are no longer interested in your current relationship. You should know what you want before you even bring something like this to the table because it can be unsettling for some people. The goal is to make sure that you're happy with whatever you do!
If your partner is DOWN ASF,
then make sure that you both understand the circumstances of the relationship and ensure that boundaries are set so that no one gets hurt or feels neglected in the relationship! When looking for an additional partner to welcome to your relationship make sure you're considering someone who you AND your partner are interested in. It is not fair to have another girlfriend or guy friend that only your partner can connect to, you want the relationship to be comfortable for everyone involved!
Once you all have found someone that makes BOTH of you sweat like thirsty dogs in the sun, then is it safe to move forward in the relationship and don't be afraid to take things slow! This isn't like your everyday monogamous arrangement and with that, you need to consider the type of emotions that may arise because you are your partner are not used to this type of circumstance. It's also OKAY if things are a little rocky at first, as long as you all are communicating and moving at a pace that is comfortable for everyone things should get groovy in NO TIME!
