As a Christian girl growing up in the Bible Belt of the United States, I have been taught that "modest is hottest."
I'm here to tell you that the outside perception of modesty is wrong.
Throw away whatever you thought it was. Modesty (in the Baptist Christian circles) is not always culottes and thick sweaters and jean skirts. Modesty is a choice for the wearer - and ignorant stereotypes don't help our case.
As an experiment in preparation for writing this article, I looked up "modest outfits" on several social media outlets and search engines. Here are some of the first results that popped up:
Those outfits are basically all the same. A girl is wearing a long dress, a skirt with tights, long sleeves, a coat, a scarf, or a head covering of some sort. While all of that is fine and dandy, I want to tell you that that is not what modesty is.
Sure, modesty is about covering yourself. It is also a personal choice and easily adaptable to your religion or lifestyle. As for myself, I choose to cover parts of my body because I do not want my brothers in Christ to stumble. Men are visual creatures, and if they see something, they can usually connect the dots. I don't want to put them in a place where they think lustful thoughts when they look at my body.
However, I stray from the negative stereotypes of modesty. I wear shorts. They don't reach my knees, but they also don't come up my butt. I wear dresses and skirts without leggings or sweaters (weather permitting). They show some skin so I can be cool in the heat, but they don't show too much chest or leg. I wear fitted clothing - I'm tall and slim and proud of my figure, and I want to show it off in a way that pleases God. I wear swimsuits, but they cover my stomach. I wear jeans! I wear pants! I wear skirts above my knees! And that is okay!
Modesty is a fine line, but both religions and secular viewpoints can distort that line.
I'm sick of people thinking I'm going to hell for showing my shoulders in a tank top on a 90-degree day.
I'm sick of people thinking I'm a prude because I don't wear bras as crop tops.
To me, modesty is all about choice. I am choosing to cover myself on the daily, but I am also letting myself breathe. I stay true to my personal style while also staying true to my personal convictions. For example, I love to swim, but I don't wear bikinis. My reasoning is that bikinis look like lingerie, and, personally, the only person I want seeing me in lingerie or something similar is my husband. I opt for a cute one-piece or tankini.
I'm not bashing women who wear bikinis. I think there are some beautiful two-pieces out there, and women have the right to wear them. I have friends with amazing bodies who look great in bikinis - and if they want to, they can wear them. I will not judge them. In fact, I will probably hype them up. They look fantastic! Everyone should stick to his own personal convictions, and my conviction is to cover a little bit. Maybe you don't have that conviction. That is your choice.
If you want to be covered from your hair to your toes, by all means, follow your convictions. But modesty is all about honoring God with your choices - you are too precious and valuable to be looked at like a piece of meat.
Modesty does not make you a judging, stifling prude.
Modesty is not a basis for salvation.
Somehow, thousands of people don't understand that.