Let me start off by saying that there is nothing wrong with those who prefer the hookup culture that has become the norm for many 20-somethings in college. Hey, to each their own. Instead, this is pointing out that there are some girls who, deep down, are hopeless romantics despite the way they may come across at times.
This is for the girls who want a boy to ask them out to dinner instead of asking them to go home at the end of the night. This is for the girls who want a best friend first, not just a one-night stand. This is for the girls who have been hurt by those one-night stands that turned into a little bit more, but not quite enough. This is for the girls who want to change the way they form relationships. This is for the girls who want a fresh start with someone real.
Coming into college, DTR isn’t the immediate action. People want to have flings, see what is out there, and they don’t want to be tied down when starting this chapter of their lives. This is all fine; take the time to figure out what you want for yourself. Freshmen, sophomore, and maybe even junior year, have a little fun and focus on the things that mean the most to you. However, for some, the hookup mindset gets to be a little old when senior year rolls around. The games that boys play with your heart aren't fun anymore. This whole idea of being “a girl” to someone and not “the girl” starts to make you think. Why are you just one of the many? Even better, why are you okay with that?
There is nothing wrong with setting your standards high. If a guy likes you, then he will like you if you go home with him at 2 a.m. or if you wait until the next afternoon and get coffee. Don’t hesitate to tell a guy what you want, from the very beginning. Call me old fashioned, but I think that with all of the technology today, there is such disconnect from actual feelings and time spent together. We have to be forward with how we feel about things when we get the chance.
Where aren’t the guys like the ones in 80s movies? Why don’t they throw their fists when they finally get the girl or hold boom boxes outside of our windows? Sure, this stuff might be totally Hollywood but these are the things us girls grow up watching.
So, the next time a girl tells you she wants to get to know you before falling for the cheap talk and moments of charm, it’s not because she wants to jump into something extremely serious. It’s because she knows what she wants and isn’t going to back down for a smooth talker with great teeth.