I remember watching the HBO documentary "About Face" and wondering if I had the looks to be a model. I studied my facial structure in the mirror and tried to locate my jawbones. I was always told I had a round face. I frowned in the mirror because my head is shaped like an apple, or as my Jamaican mom says "a jack fruit."
As I watched the profile of the model Pat Cleveland on "About Face," I wanted to be fabulous like her. She had a beautiful heart-shaped face, freckles mystical green eyes. She had a fearless runway walk--the documentary showed her sashaying and twirling around the runway in the seventies and the eighties. She was successful in the seventies when people were still getting accustomed to black models. What did she have that I didn't have?
I've always been fascinated by models. I remember the White House/Black market commercial that used to be play on heavy rotation. Coca Rocha used her spidery long legs to tap dance and create angles with her body as she modeled outfits. She looked both slick and defiant. I wanted to emulate that same slickness and defiance of gravity. You can view the video here:
Specifically, in the 2010's I went through an androgynous phase after I saw Agyness Dean on the pages of Teen Vogue. I appreciated this pixie-like woman because she had an icy blond crop haircut paired with a sporty, ironic style. I wanted the industry to accept me like it accepted her. Why was she the "it girl?"
My next modeling obsession was Jourdan Dunn. To me she was perfection. She had an elegant walk and creamy, flawless chocolate skin. Like Agyness Deyn, she had a unique and sporty street style that I wanted to emulate. Along with Cara Delevingne (one of her model besties) Jourdan Dunn initiated my love of beanies with her off duty street pictures. I am so fascinated by this fabulous creature that I periodically tune into her Youtube cooking show, "Well Dunn with Jourdan Dunn" to immerse myself in her swag and sense of humor. Jourdan Dunn proves that she is more than a clothes hanger--her down to earth personality touches people.
My latest modeling obsession is Karlie Kloss. Her graceful runway walk has earned her the nickname "The Panther" for a reason! Her garments shimmy when she walks. She maintains perfect poise as she stomps down the runway with not a step out of position. However, she is more than a walker--she is a mover! She did a sort of voguish dance at the Spring 2014 Jean Paul Gaultier runway show before stomping down the runway. Notably, Karlie takes advantage of her left brain because she codes in her free time while initiating a scholarship program to teach young girls to code! You can view her stellar dance moves at the Spring 2014 Jean Paul Gaultier show here:Despite my belief that models are empowering, I do not think so of the modeling industry. While I stare at the diverse forms of attraction and beauty that this current season of "America's Next Top Model" provides, I cringe in anger at the shallow comments that are thrown at the contestants from fellow contestants and judges alike. Based on the way the show portrays the modeling industry, the way certain movies portray the modeling industry and on my personal experiences with beauty ideals, I think that the modeling industry perpetuates self-destructive standards.
In one of the early episodes of cycle 22 on "America's Next Top Model," a contestant named Stefano, tells a model named Alexis that she does not belong in the competition because she has fake boobs and she does not remind him of a model. Mind you, he tells her this right before a photo shoot. Excuse me, but it is superficial to say that someone should go home because they do not fit the mold of an ideal model. Eventually Alexis does go home because she doesn't feel comfortable living with the other contestants during the competition. It is one thing for her to be judged if she does not have the mental toughness to remain in the competition. As for her looks, although she resembles a stereotypical Barbie doll with mermaid long hair I don't think that she should be dismissed because her image is not high fashion. Alexis knows that others find her pretty--in fact she tearfully revealed that she was bullied in school because girls expected her to be bitchy due to her appearance.
The modeling industry is harmful because it suggests that being too pretty and not looking high fashion enough is a bad thing. You can get in the door with your face and your body but to stay within the boundaries of the door you have to look high fashion, which is a vague and subjective requirement.
A similar comment was made and will still be made about the contestant Hadassah. Hadassah has velvety chocolate brown skin and a curvy physique but she is bounded by her status as a "pageant girl." Although the judges compliment her on her royal beauty, she is consistently told her that she is not high fashion enough. Both her personality and her photos fail to evoke a high fashion sentiment.The judges remind her that she needs to stop coasting by on her looks. Both the contestants and the judges do not appreciate her so called "arrogant" and combative demeanor. Despite all of these critiques that are aimed at Hadassah she is still in the competition. In fact, during last week's possession themed photo shoot , the judges contradicted themselves because they appreciated her picture because they found her profile lovely. They admitted that this was her strength. I guess that those pageant looks are proving valuable after all! The judges have a push and hug relationship with Hadassah because they like her look, but then they don't.
Besides, the push and hug relationship that the judges have with Hadassah, they also have a push and hug relationship with Nyle. They consistently complain that he is not sexy enough during his panel review! Tyra Banks or Kelly Cutrone even told him that he looks like a professor when he appears before a judging panel in a past episode. Furthermore, they criticize his pictures because they find his facial expression "too sweet." They want him to appear and behave in a sexy and masculine way because they think that he has a sexy and strong look. In Nyle's defense, a picture can be edgy without sex appeal! Also, they totally objectify Nyle when they tell him to lift his shirt up to display his abs. They contradict themselves because they say that male models should be thought of as more than accessories, but yet, they objectify him! They want him to be animalistic--they want him to fulfill the fantasy that they have for male models. He must not be his own person, he must not be an individual. Another thing that bothers me is that they tell Nyle that he has to convey his emotions through his body because he is deaf. Therefore, he cannot hear commands during challenges. Unfortunately, they reduced him to a piece of meat during this weeks perfume commercial! Poor guy. He is lost in the ebb and flow of the judges psyches.
The push and hug relationship that the judges have with the contestants on "America's Next Top Model" seems to resemble the push and hug relationship that the modeling industry has with their models. I remember when someone at my college proclaimed that fashion designers prefer odd looking models because they do not distract from the beauty of their clothes. However, that girl missed pivotal observations. Models can not be too strange looking because their teeth have to be presentable and as white as possible. Their skin has to be flawless and they have to have ideal proportions for their body type. Somebody please create a one size fits all model for casting agents, fashion designers. commercial directors, fashion photographers and the fashion industry in general. I don't think he or she exists. And there lies the problem. You will never be good enough. You have the looks but you are a piece of work who must be fixed.
I remember when I was sort of "scouted" about two years ago at a bus station. I was wearing pink sun glasses and I was stopped by a couple because they decided that I was attractive enough to be interrogated. As I took off my sunglasses after they commented that I was "hiding" they said that I had a nice smile. The guy then proceeded to ask me what I liked to do for fun. He was taken aback when I responded that I like to go to the movies. He then replied, "you don't like to go to clubs and stuff?" and something with the word party. I was offended that my individuality was not appreciated. He then asked me if I was photogenic and insisted that this would be important. I was insulted because he saw me in person and should be able to decide for himself. I didn't go to the sketchy photo shoot because they insisted that I give them my number to go down to their studio. Besides, the photo would go on a raunchy adult website and would look terrible on a resume. I still like to think of it as a scouting so I can think that I achieved something in the modeling industry. However, I felt like I didn't fit into their mold of an ideal model because i was not "outgoing" and "fun loving" enough. This harmed my self-esteem.
When I reflect on the harmful aspects of the modeling industry, the movie "Gia" captures the complicated push and hug relationship between the models and the authorities in the industry. Major figures in the fashion industry were both drawn to and repelled by Gia. This is the same sentiment that is reflected in "America's Next Top Model" and my own experience. She didn't fit the mold of the blond bombshell model of the seventies. She didn't look like a typical model of her time. She was dark. She was brassy. However, her intriguing pictures made her bankable and somewhat of an "it" model during the late seventies and early eighties. During one scene in the movie, Gia switches poses as she appears nude in front of a photographer to whet his sexual appetite. She is even encouraged to make out with a female makeup artist on the set to inspire the photographer. In retrospect sex sells in the modeling industry. Just look at the stifling perfume ads that feature male and female models intently staring at each other on a beach. In my opinion, the sexual obsession that pervades in the modeling industry is linked to the objectification that all models face. The objectification that stifles individuality.
We can't be ourselves in the modeling industry because that very industry does not totally love their models. There are aspects of ourselves that have to be fixed, hammered out, sacrificed and pronounced for a commercial, picture or runway show. The process of modeling induces internal turmoil because we have to estimate what agents, panels, directors and photographers want from us and act accordingly. They decide how we should act unless some of us are lucky enough to be considered muses. We are confronted with how wrong we are.
Although models such as Coca Rocha, Jourdan Dunn, and Karlie Kloss standout from the rest of the modeling pack because they choose hobbies that empower them, they will have to think objectively as they try to land modeling jobs. They must lose parts of their individuality because they have to adopt an outsiders perspective and present their best selves to the gatekeepers of the modeling industry. And of course their best selves will always be up for subjective revising. As I reflect on the notion of lost individuality, I no longer equate the modeling industry with empowerment.
